Release Blitz + Giveaway: Perfectly Mismatched (Pine Wood Falls #4) by Sarah Havan

Join author Sarah Havan and Gay Book Promotions as they celebrate the release of Perfectly Mismatched (Pine Wood Falls #4)! Find out more about the mpreg romance and enter in the $10 Amazon gift card giveaway!

RELEASE BLITZ

Book Title: Perfectly Mismatched (Pine Wood Falls #4)

Author: Sarah Havan

Publisher: Sarah Havan Books

Cover Artist: Sarah Havan

Release Date: June 22, 2021

Genres: Mpreg, Non-shifter Mpreg romance

Tropes:  Frenemies to lovers 

Themes: Recovering from trauma, starting a new life

Heat Rating: 4 flames      

Length:  approx. 80 000 words

It is part of a series but can be read as a standalone.

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Buy Links - Available in Kindle Unlimited

Amazon US   |  Amazon UK 

They’re fated even though they can’t stand each other.

Blurb

Dekker Baines decides he wants to start a family, but he doesn’t have an alpha, so he goes to one of Pine Wood Falls get-togethers. It’s where you go if you need someone to mate with, but his evening goes sideways when a few alphas don’t take no for an answer.

Ryder Remington is Dekk’s business partner, and when he gets a call that Dekk is in trouble, he runs to his rescue and comes across a scene that makes his blood boil. A month after the attack, when Dekk goes into heat again, Ryder tells him he’ll be the father of his children. Dekk is reluctant at first but can’t fight his urge to be with child.

Now they’re starting a family, but the thing is, they can’t stand each other. They are as mismatched as two people can get. Together they have to navigate recovering from trauma, try to tolerate living with each other, and get ready for quintuplets. If they can manage all of that, they might get their happy ending, but things never go according to plan.

Excerpt 

BALLING MY FISTS AT MY SIDE, I TOOK IN A DEEP BREATH. It was one of those moments where I wondered why I went into business with this man. Ryder Remington was very punchable, but like I could have ever punched him, he towered over me.

“There’s no way in hell we’re naming the bar that.” He scratched the dark stubble on his jaw and shook his head.

I crossed my arms over my chest and smiled. “Why? It’s cute, a play on words.”

“Bars aren’t supposed to be cute,” he grumbled.

“Not everything has to always be macho and manly.” I sat at the bar with my laptop in front of me. 

“Macho. Who uses that word? You know who? Someone who likes cute. For now, the bar is staying named bar.” He couldn’t even be bothered to capitalize it. The sign above the door outside seriously said bar. From where he squatted on the floor, he bore his dark-brown eyes into me, pressing his lips together. It was his go-to I’m an alpha, and you’re going to listen to me look.

“But The Ballet Bar has such a nice ring to it.”

“No.”

I stuck my nose up in the air. “Fine, always so grouchy.”

“I’m not grouchy,” he said, snarling his lip. 

“Gruff.” A perfect word for him. Demeanor and looks. He was a six-foot-five wall of muscle with light tan skin and a head of thick wavy hair. He always wore dark jeans and a black T-shirt and seemed to favor the perfect amount of stubble. And if I didn’t know him and was in a dark alley with him, I’d turn and go in the opposite direction. He always looked like he wanted to harm somebody.

“Aren’t you supposed to be doing some kind of work?” he asked as he emptied the box of bottles next to him.

“Aren’t you?” I flicked my wrist in his direction, and besides, I was doing work. Someone had to keep our business affairs in order. I had just finished placing an order for a new local craft beer we were going to try.

“How did I get talked into opening this place with you?” He stood and folded up the now empty box.

“You saw the brilliance behind my plan.” Basically, I was able to front half the money to open the place. Pine Wood Falls offered a lot of assistance if you opened a business there, like land or a storefront, but there were plenty of other things needed to open a business that required capital. I had moved back to the area about half a year before and wanted something new in my life. Plus, being my own boss sweetened the deal, and my friend Lucas told me he heard about how Ryder was looking for a business partner.

He furrowed his brow and began to wipe down the counter. “And you know what?”

“You know what I know? You’re still trying to come up with a response.”

“You’re supposed to be the business end. In the back, doing the books.”

“Do you know that running a business entails more than some money and doing the books as you say?”

He ignored me and continued to wipe the counter.

“And I put up half the money, too, so I should have just as much right naming the place. You’re the one that makes the drinks, but it doesn’t make you special.” He thought since he was the alpha, he got to call the shots, but we were in it fifty/fifty. Therefore, even if he only saw me as some little omega, I still had an equal say, and I was not ready to give up my fight on naming the bar, but for the day, I let it go.

“It does. I’m so goddamn special.”

“You precious little peach you.”

“Said the ballerina.”

“Said the college dropout.”

“I went and tried. Did you ever take a college course? No.”

Well, he had me there. “I was at an elite dance academy.”

He put his hands on the edge of the bar and leaned in toward me. “For high school.”

“I was actually there until a year after high school,” I said.

“See, and you’re making fun of me. I’m a proud college dropout. You, it seems, was held back at your fancy pants school.” He smirked and threw the towel he wiped down the counter with over his shoulder.

About the Author 

Sarah Havan writes all kinds of LGBTQIA+ romance, loves watermelon flavored candy, and has a vast flannel shirt collection. When not writing, Sarah loves to read and watch shows about murder.

Author Links

Blog/Website  |  Facebook  |  Twitter

Instagram  |  Patreon

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Guest Review: Fish on a Bicycle (Fish Out of Water #5) by Amy Lane

Jackson Rivers has always bucked the rules—and bucking the rules of recovery is no exception. Now that he and Ellery are starting their own law firm, there’s no reason he can’t rush into trouble and take the same risks as always, right?

Maybe not. Their first case is a doozy, involving porn stars, drug empires, and daddy issues, and their client, Henry Worrall, wants to be an active participant in his own defense. As Henry and Jackson fight the bad guys and each other to find out who dumped the porn star in the trash can, Jackson must reexamine his assumptions that four months of rest and a few good conversations have made him all better inside.

Jackson keeps crashing his bicycle of self-care and a successful relationship, and Ellery wonders what’s going to give out first—Jackson’s health or Ellery’s patience. Jackson’s body hasn’t forgiven him for past crimes. Can Ellery forgive him for his current sins? And can they keep Henry from going to jail for sleeping with the wrong guy at the wrong time?

Being a fish out of water is tough—but if you give a fish a bicycle, how’s he going to swim?

Reviewer: Annika

I have probably said it before – and most likely will do it again, but Fish out of Water is by far my favourite series by Amy Lane’s. There’s just so much to love about it, so many great characters you care for – even the ones you only meet in passing. I would have to agree with Ellery, there’s something with Jackson that draws people to him, like moths to flame we are all drawn to this battered man. I can’t believe it took me so long to get to this book. I mean I did try to hold out for the audio and Greg Tremblay, but I’m weak and caved…

When we catch up with Ellery and Jackson they are both recovering from their last battle. And the recovery is a rough one, months long even, but they are both determined to make it through, to start their new firm and for life to settle a bit. And for a while that plan works out well, they are mending and are in the process of finishing the renovations for their newly acquired office space, when a client walks in asking for their help. One is a lawyer (not yet able to practice law in the state) and one is Henry, a 27 year old army vet with a chip on his shoulder to rival the Empire State Building, and the baggage to match. How no one had strangled that man is a complete mystery to me, because when we first met him he was anything but pleasant to be around.

Also, holy moly the amount of angst that was jam packed into this story. I physically ached, while reading some parts, had tears in my eyes for others. And often did I want to hit someone, mostly Jackson or Henry, over the head for being stupid. I know they both had their reasons for being so closed off, I mean the shit they had in their baggage was enough to last ten people several lifetimes over. But still, for their sakes as well as the people that cared for them, I wanted them to open up a little, to share their hurt and be able to heal just a little bit. I don't think they will ever fully heal, especially not Jackson, but I wish for him to at least stop bleeding from his old wounds, that they could scab over or even scar. And I mean that literally as well as figuratively as he seems to always amass new injuries.

It would be nice to see Ellery and Jackson working smaller cases every once in a while. I mean there must be some cases out there not drenched layers and layers of conspiracies, assassins or kingpins? What was it Kryzynski said, “You can’t lift up a single goddamned rock and not find a goddamned fire-breathing dragon, can you?”, because man are there hordes of fire-breathing dragons in this series, I mean couldn’t they find a wolf or bear to wrestle with – you know it might be easier on their health and life expectancy.

I only have one negative thing for me and that was the crossover to yet another series. Personally I’m so rarely a fan of this, I don’t mind spin-offs, those are another chapter all together, but connecting books and series that have nothing in common don’t sit well with me, I’m sorry it feels like a marketing trick and on me it has the opposite effect than what I assume is the desired one – to buy and read the other series. Sadly I tend to go the other way. This is highly preferential and I know many, maybe even most readers love any and all cross-overs.

On a positive note I really like Henry and Jackson. I mean it was clear early on that the two of them were so similar that they would either end up killing each other (and they did a fine job trying to do just that, I might add), or end up on the same side fighting for those who can’t fight for themselves. I’m really looking forward to see where their partnership will lead them, because let’s face it, that’s where they are heading.

I'm addicted to Ellery and Jackson and even Billy Bob, and hope there will be more adventures in the future. I also hope that those adventures won't land any of them (or their loved ones) in the hospital, but going by experience, there will be many more scars to come.

A copy of this book was generously provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review

Review: When It All Falls Down by Tanya Chris

Maybe Charlie should have waited until he graduated high school before coming out, because since that revelation there’s been a growing distance between him and his friends. Charlie’s tough, though. He doesn’t mind eating lunch alone or watching his former gang interact with their new best buddy. What he does mind is seeing Drew Lavoitt suffer the same fate.

Drew didn’t come out. As far as he, or anyone else knows, he’s straight. What Drew did is accidentally hit and kill a little girl. Now the boy who was voted Most Popular, and who Charlie has maybe had a crush on since eighth grade, faces financial ruin, expulsion, and the fear that if he’s not everything, he’s not enough.
Popularity, wealth, acclaim—these things are easily lost. In each other’s arms, Drew and Charlie find something that can’t be taken from them. Together the two build a foundation on which they can re-create their lives.

My Kindle notes say: Great story, happy vibe, positive vibe, and I think this sums up the book nicely. It seems from the blurb that this could be a real drama driven book, with teen angst all over the place - but it wasn't. Whilst some of the events in this story were sad and some difficult to deal with, the story as a whole was positive. It showed how people, in this case teens, cope and deal with circumstances beyond their control. 

The character of Charlie was interesting to me. Often we see how bad coming out is for teens, in this book though, Charlie, for the most part, actually expected a worse reaction from people than what he got. I know that this is far, far from the experience of many people coming out. It gives me hope though, that the future of GBLTQ people is better than that of the past. My first reaction was to think that such positivity was unrealistic - then I thought about all the prom proposal videos that circle each year featuring GBLTQ youth and I realised that things are getting better. 

Younger generations, for a good part, don't discriminate. They stand behind their peers and celebrate the diversity of their generation. (Too) slowly things are changing for the better. Or at least they have been, but this is a book review, not a political statement. My point is, that Charlie expected negativity when he came out. He actually read it in places that it wasn't, in his group of friends, with his father... His expectations were of the worst, and it didn't turn out that way. I really hope that this is the case for the very near future.

Drew, I felt incredibly sorry for. He'd accidentally killed a 6 year old, through no fault of his own. An unpreventable accident - how devastating this must be. I've driven for 22 years and I've yet to enjoy it for exactly that reason, the fear of the damage a car can do in a moment of time. I can't imagine the enormous pressure and guilt (that most useless of emotions) Drew is under. He is coming to terms with it, so is his family and the people where they live. My heart ached for him.Then Charlie - brave and strong and hating seeing Drew on his own - spoke to Drew and changed the course of both their lives. 

A really great story, I would recommend this to romance lovers and YA fans.

A copy of this book was given in exchange for an honest review.
For more information see Goodreads.

Review: Safe Haven by Caitlin Ricci

Being alone was what Blake had always needed before his new team of bodyguards arrived.

Now things might be very different. At seven years old, Blake’s life was destroyed when he and his parents were abducted and he watched them being murdered. Now, twenty years later, he refuses to leave the house and he lives in a constant state of fear. He has a bodyguard around the clock, a housekeeper who has never seen his face and an uncle who checks on him often but isn’t all that close to him. Blake likes his isolation where only his cat really knows him. 

His bodyguard of eight years is ready to retire, leaving his life in turmoil again. Blake isn’t good with people in general, and new people are the worst. But he needs someone in his house all the time to make him feel safe. His uncle hires a team of bodyguards to replace his old one—Malcolm, CJ and Rex. They come highly recommended, and they’re good at what they do.

They’re also together and it’s a relationship that Blake is instantly fascinated by. He’s never been interested in another person before, and he hasn’t had a real friend since his parents died, because he has refused to leave the house. But with the three of them trying to be there for him, he begins to want a life he has been convinced up to now would be completely impossible.

After I read this one I had to sit on it for a few days. I’ve come to the same conclusion after a couple of days that I had right after I finished. This story is slightly fucked up. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, I mean, if the bodyguard trope with a big side of hurt/comfort is your jam, you’ll eat this one up. I found the blurb a little misleading and you should know that before going in. I had the impression this was going to be a four way relationship story, but it was really more of a character study on Blake. This bulk of the book is in his head and his struggles to work through his trauma. I could have gotten behind that story, it would have been really interesting if incredibly heavy.

That’s not what I got though. Blake struggled and the new bodyguards, Malcolm, CJ and Rex comforted him, in . . . ways . . .I . . .just can’t even. Ok, so you know how we’re all familiar with the magic peen? How the alpha male comes along and solves ALL the problems of the hurt MC with his cure-all boner? That magic peen? Well, considering how incredibly damaged Blake was I was ready to ride the magic peen trope pony into this one, kindle a blazing. I figured it would take all three fantastical dicks to get Blake and I healed by the end. BUT, and this is a really big BUT, there is virtually no peen to be found.

In and of itself, a peen free story is not a bad thing and while it wasn’t what I expected, honestly, as messed up as Blake was, a story chock full of dong would have been super weird. My issue was with how Malcolm, CJ and Rex got through to Blake and how Blake accepted the weirdest crap from them. As I said, the story is all from Blake, so the bodyguards are never really fully fleshed out characters and the only real thing I now about them is how each of them fills a specific void in Blake’s psyche. One’s a comforter, one’s a protector and one pushes Blake to challenge his limits. Sounds pretty good huh?

I am by no means a mental health expert, but FFS, I know when a guy hasn’t had physical contact with anyone or stepped outside in twenty years, one of the bodyguards should not pin him down and tell Blake how much power he has over him and how he could hurt him but won’t and isn’t that great, doesn’t Blake feel safer now? I’m thinking that’s the exact opposite of what your bodyguard should do. Said bodyguard should also probably not beat off in front of the camera that connects to Blake’s room because he’s sure Blake is watching, will like it and “wants” them. Seriously, if I’M saying something is inappropriate, it is really, really, really inappropriate. This all happens during the first week or two they work there and while I was slightly horrified, Blake loved it, so who the hell am I to judge really.

All I can say is, if you’re going in, leave reality at the door. All the reality. Blake’s a really likable character and I couldn’t help but root for the guy, plus the story is well written and easy to get sucked into. And Blake did get his HEA, which made me happy. The four ended up with an epilogue that made all their dreams come true. We don’t really know how they got there, but they did and Blake deserved it no matter how unrealistic the journey.

For more information on Safe Haven, check it out on Goodreads.

**a copy of this story was provided for an honest review**

Review: The Art of Hero Worship by Mia Kerick

Trembling on the floor, pressed beneath a row of seats in a dark theater, college freshman Jason Tripp listens to the terrifying sound of gunshots, as an unknown shooter moves methodically through the theater, randomly murdering men, women, and children attending a student performance of Hamlet. Junior Liam Norcross drapes his massive body on top of Jason, sheltering the younger man from the deathly hail of bullets, risking his life willingly, and maybe even eagerly.

As a result of the shared horror, an extraordinary bond forms between the two young men, which causes discomfort for family and friends, as well as for Jason and Liam, themselves. And added to the challenge of two previously “straight” men falling into a same-sex love, are the complications that arise from the abundance of secrets Liam holds with regard to a past family tragedy. The fledgling passion between the men seems bound to fade away into the darkness from which it emerged.

Jason, however, is inexplicably called to rescue his hero in return, by delving into Liam’s shady past and uncovering the mystery that compels the older man to act as the college town’s selfless savior.

The Art of Hero Worship takes the reader on a voyage from the dark and chilling chaos that accompanies a mass shooting to the thrill of an unexpected and sensual romance.

"Why do I need you so much? Why am I addicted to your arms and your voice and your sound and your smell?"
"I... I don't know"
"You saved me."

Right out of the gate, we're thrust into this intense scene where our MC's are victims of a theater shooting. Jason panics, and then freezes. He makes decisions he'll later regret and the only reason he got out of there alive was because of Liam. A stranger that protected Jason and got him to safety.

During this scene and shortly after, Liam and Jason make some stupid decisions. I was ready to put the book down. I was not about to read an entire novel featuring these two morons. But I eventually found my heart and realized these guys were just involved in a shooting. They panicked (of course!) and made some silly decisions. Nobody can predict how someone would react in a situation like that. We'd all like to think we'd keep our heads and be smart. Well, that's what Jason thought, too.

Jason had many regrets from that day and had a hard time dealing with the aftermath. He found comfort in the short time he spent with Liam, before he had to go back to reality. He became a shell of his former self, refusing to go out. Until he met up with Liam again and he found a glimmer of hope that he might be able to feel normal again. Jason isn't sure of why he feels this way for Liam, or what his feelings are exactly, for that matter. He's never looked twice at another guy before, but there was something about Liam that Jason needed.

"I want to worship my hero, as he so deserves. I want to show him with my body the tangle of feelings inside me. Because my emotions are all caught up like a fish in a net... and the more I struggle to escape them, the more they entrap me."

Liam needed Jason just as much, but in a different way. He saved Jason that horrible day in the theater, and wanted to always keep him safe. He felt a strong urge to keep Jason protected and for Jason to be his.

This is a double GFY story and the guys bring the emotion in spades. They had a lot of chemistry on a emotional level. They (especially Jason) have so much turmoil in their lives and struggle to move on from the shooting they witnessed. They rely heavily on each other for comfort and support. Even though both of them always thought of themselves as straight, they never tried to deny the strong feelings that developed between them.

"I think I told you this last night, but I'm going to say it again. I couldn't feel the way I do for anyone but you-- male or female. I feel so much... I think I could fall in love with you."

Emotionally? They were really great together. Physically and sexually... not so much. It's a double GFY, for goodness sake! Where was the sexual tension? They were definitely more connected on an emotional level rather than physical. I don't need sex in a book in order for me to enjoy it and I have plenty of favorites that don't have any sex scenes. But if there's going to be on page sex, I'd like some chemistry and tension. Please and thank you.

Some of the characters were OTT, especially the women. They were painted in a particularly negative light. Every once in a while it's fine with me, but most of the women in the story? No thank you. 

The dialogue felt too formal and stilted. I admit, I highlighted the crap out of this story and there were plenty of scenes and quotes that I loved, but sometimes there were quotes that I just can't picture anyone saying, let alone a college student. 

As always with Mia Kerick, there was a beautiful message in Jason and Liam's story. The Art of Hero Worship really focused on labels... and then chucking them out the door. They don't matter. Love is love.

A copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.

Find out more info on Goodreads.

Review: Silver Scars by Posy Roberts

You need people to love you, especially when you shove them away.

A bomb destroyed high-powered lawyer Gil Lemieux’s seemingly perfect life, and PTSD has ruled every decision since the explosion that left him scarred inside and outside. Moving home with his mom is meant to be a temporary measure, just like proofreading for a medical editorial firm is meant to be a stopgap. But two years after taking on the wrong court case, he’s still living in fear.

Keith Kramer might be based 1,500 miles away from Gil, but their shared work brings them together—a chance meeting that’s life-changing. Gil is drawn to Keith’s good looks and intelligence, but it’s his innate understanding that Gil is more than the scars on his skin that is truly attractive. He’s everything Gil used to be and more. It blows Gil’s mind that his attraction might be returned.

Only doubt could widen the distance between them. Keith’s hopefulness, borne out of surviving some tough challenges of his own, isn’t enough to bridge the distance alone. Gil will need to believe he has as much to offer as Keith if they’re to build a life together.

Gil's story is heartbreaking really, and tells tale of just how fragile life is. Not just in the live or die way, but in the way that, as humans,we think we know where our life is going. We have a plan, we've done the schooling, got the job, the house, the family, the whatever it is we've strived for (or we're in the midst of doing said things) and we rarely anticipate how easily it can all be snatched away.

We see daily on the news disasters happening, but they are something that happens to other people. In Silver Scars Gil becomes that 'other' person, the one on the news. It could have been a flood, a gas explosion, a house fire...any number of things, for Gil though it was someone he'd pissed off in his job as a lawyer and a homemade bomb. That he got away with his life is barely comforting when that life is so compromised by PTSD that he finds it hard to leave his house. Well, his mom's house, despite living alone for numerous years, that is out of the question now.

Everyday is a struggle for Gil. He gives himself challenges - sometimes he meets them, other times he doesn't. When he makes it a cross country on board a plane alone for work, he is rightly proud of himself. It's hard, he feels judged as people look at the scars the bomb left him with. Obvious and ugly and god, please don't ask about them. And some do, some don't, some stare, others ignore...

Keith pays no attention to them whatsoever. Thank fuck. Because Keith is doing things to Gil's libido that he hasn't felt since before the bomb. Keith is gorgeous and friendly and makes Gil laugh. He also makes him feel at ease. Shame he's so ostentatious and flashy, with his carved cane fashion accessory.

Except he isn't. Keith understands all too well the pain of recreating your life.

I loved how both of these characters found each other. Two people with their own battle scars, physical and mental. Seen and unseen. I liked the understanding and empathy they had for each other and the way they worked to build a life together - despite there being as many downs as ups in their relationship. That is, after all, the way of life. It's not what you have to face much of the time but how you face it, and that is a really strong message in this story. 

This story, despite the content of PDST and trauma, actually felt very happy and positive. Sure, both characters had days when they weren't coping well, when they were dealing with the shit life threw at them, but overall I found that the love story over rode those moments. It gave both Gil and Keith something to hope for, to trust in - it gave them strength. They didn't fight each others battles, that would not be possible, but they gave each other the strength to fight their own.  And that is an amazing thing.

A really enjoyable story. 

A copy of the story was given in exchange for an honest review.

For more information see Goodreads.

Review: Dangerously Happy by Varian Krylov

Aidan has always played it safe. Instead of pursuing his dream of creating innovative music that makes his soul sing, he settled for a degree in software, a job in a cubicle, and a spot in a generic band with his buddies.

And he's always been straight. But when he's seduced by magnetic local literary luminary Dario, Aidan must decide whether to keep playing it safe, or succumb to a ravenous passion and a nourishing love unlike anything he's experienced before. Will he find the courage to go after real happiness if it means admitting he's in love with a man?

Their journey together isn't easy. Sometimes it isn't safe. Even if Aidan has the courage to admit he's in love with Dario, can he endure the repercussions of the traumatic event in Dario's past?

This novel has mature content and is intended for readers over the age of eighteen. Although this is a story about two men falling in love, there are extended, explicit sex scenes, including some BDSM, m/m/m and m/m/f scenes. There are references to sexual violence which may be a trigger for some readers, although there is no graphic depiction of rape in the book.

A copy of this book was provided by the author for an honest review - however I already owned a copy of it....the review will still be honest though!

Every now and then I come across a book that I find really difficult to rate and this is one of them. It took me a lot of pondering to decide on a 4 heart review, and I will explain my reasoning for it.

You may, or may not know, that very often I don't look at a book's blurb - while I can stay away from handbags and shoes, and happily live in supermarket clothes, I am a compulsive book buyer (notices the nods, you too huh!), well, this was one of those books. The cover is PRETTY, the hype on FB etc good, I had no idea what it was about and purchased it. Then a request came in to the blog and, as I already had it, I thought why not, I'll review it - but I still hadn't a clue what the book was about. In fact I only discovered what the book was about as I was reading it.

This book is a mish-mash of romance and erotica and I'm not sure which bit dominates. I'm not against a bit of BDSM in my novels but it certainly isn't the staple of my literary diet. This has BDSM, menage (M/M/F & M/M/M). Now, I'm a romance girl through and through. For some reason I found the M/M/F scene harder to read...maybe I'm just to used to reading about the men at the moment, maybe I have deep-set psychological issues. Who knows. That isn't to say though, that the scene wasn't well written, it was, as were the M/M/M scenes. I think perhaps I have to be in a certain mood for the more erotic end of the romance scale and trying to read it in the holidays with the children asking questions every couple of minutes isn't really the way to set that mood. So I guess that's a convoluted way of saying it wasn't really what I was looking for to read at this moment in time. However it was very well written so I shan't knock of any marks for my own personal hormonal response.

The romance though, well that was something that I could get on board with. That first moment between Aiden and Dario, hells bells, now to me, that right there is SUPER hot. I adored the way we saw them fall in love through the obstacles and difficulties. And they really did fall in love. Krylov's writing style is very unique to her, it took me a few pages to get into it but once I did I thoroughly enjoyed the first person narrative, the long poetic sentences and I felt as though I understood Aiden completely. We saw Dario through Aiden's eyes, with Aiden's insecurities, but it was still very easy to understand him as a person, I very much liked both MC's.

I found the traumatic event in Dario's past hard, I also found the way he dealt with it hard. That is not just an issue with this book, it's something I've found in other stories of the same nature. Just because I have difficulty understanding the way he deals with his trauma doesn't mean that I think it was written badly or dealt with wrongly. I think when we empathise with characters in books it's often because we recognise our own traits/thoughts in them. In this case Dario is very opposite to me but I could empathise with him because the character was so clear - I just couldn't understand it on a personal level.

I think my thoughts on this really are, Varian Krylov is a wonderful writer and I love her writing style - her content though is not my preferred read. It's definitely a case of it's not you, it's me. I will say, if you have any potential triggers, please read the warnings before you choose this book. If BDSM, menage & romance are your things, then this book really could be for you.

Review: Complementary Colors by Adrienne Wilder

My sister Julia manipulated my life into a prison to keep me silent about our dirty family secret. Her greed made me a slave and circumstance left me with no way to escape.

Trapped, the only way I could silence the nightmares driving me to insanity was to wrap them in color, hold them with shadow, and stitch them to negative space with line.

But no matter how bright the pigments, no one could see my confession.

Except for Roy Callahan.

I thought he was just another nameless one-night stand in a long line of many.
But I was wrong. Roy could see past the façade of my life and through the veil color over the canvas. He could see what the world couldn’t.

And with him I’d find the courage to tell the truth about the boy.

The boy who kissed me.
The boy who loved me.
The boy whose name I couldn’t remember.

"What would life be like filled with simple moments like this? For time to be measured in heartbeats and exhales rather than seconds and minutes?"

This book. Oh my god, this book. I loved it. Hurt and angst and pain are books I read sparingly. Sometimes I can find books featuring disabilities or PTSD or mental health or abuse issues very manipulative. Manipulative in that parts of the story seem to there just for the sake of being there, to add trauma and not a natural part of the story - formulaic maybe. This book though was not at all like that, not one little bit. It was written with beauty, a beauty that shone through even the ugliest parts of the tale.

Paris is the MC and it is through his eyes that we see this story unfold. It's his emotions, actions and broken memories that we are witness to and I have to say I was so drawn into his story that when I fell asleep reading it at stupid o'clock, I found myself waking up an hour later and carrying on into the middle of the night. I felt every single bit of Paris - the parts he exposed and those he tried to hide.

Paris is an artist and I ADORED the way Adrienne Wilder used colours to explain his feelings, his emotions...or I should say, how Paris used the colours. His brain was so full of his half remembered childhood that there weren't always sufficient words to say how he felt...oft times he didn't know how he felt, it was all colour to him. The good times and the bad. Adrienne has a beautiful, descriptive way of writing - poetic really.

"Morning turned the kitchen into gold, and dust motes dance and twirled in the sunbeams. A door slammed somewhere, and a woman yelled. An infant cried for his mother. Then someone turned up their radio drowning out the sounds of urban poverty under a steady bass thump."

Along with the wonderfully broken MC, the author managed to create some vivid characters. Part of me felt almost shocked at how nasty and manipulative Julia was, not I think because she was female, but because she was his sister. Malignant from the inside out, she terrified me and I truly did not know how this story would end. Roy. The saviour really, I will always have a soft spot for Roy from now on. I Love characters that protect, characters whose love means more than their own life.

I think that really this story is a love story. It is the love between Roy and Paris but it is also Paris learning to love himself. It is not an easy book to read, you will be dragged down and up again and then back down. It will get you in its grasp and you won't be able to stop reading. You'll need to know just s little bit more, just a little bit more. I would totally recommend this book to everyone, though those who find abusive stories a trigger will want to avoid it. A fantastic book written with depth, feeling and understanding.

An arc of this book was given in exchange for an honest review.

Review: Violence Begets by P.T. Denys

After a tragic accident devastates his family, 16-year-old Rick St. James starts his junior year of high school alone in a suburb of Salt Lake City, Utah. When he meets Kevin Vincent, he’s too distracted by the promise of new friends to see that Kevin has secrets of his own.

Having created an environment where he's feared and admired by his classmates, Kevin finds pleasure in using his good looks and violence to control and manipulate those around him. Secretly, he cruises the gay club scene, turning tricks to earn money so he can party and get high.

As Rick’s dad becomes increasingly violent and abusive at home, the two form a surprising and volatile trust. In this battle of wills, their precarious friendship will either keep their lives from blowing up around them or possibly light the fuse that will cause the explosion.

My initial reaction to this book -

I could not stop reading this book, it was brilliant and beautiful. It was also brutal and unbelievably sad and I won't forget it for a long time.

I may write a more extensive review once my head and heart have healed a little.

Well a week has passed but I'm still struggling to put into words how much I loved this book. Be warned, it is sad - it is more than sad, it's tragic - from the beginning to the end. Yet in the middle something beautiful blossoms. Have you ever seen a patch of weed with a pretty flower in the middle, well that is this book to me.

I'm not going to rehash the blurb or the story, there's no point. I will say at the start I HATED Kevin...just goes to show, don't judge a book by it's cover, or don't make assumptions til you know the full story. Yeah, it was one of those books that made you stop and think about your interactions and responses to people. Nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors. Instead of being preachy though, this story made me love the characters and because of that I felt every, single moment of their pain. Each and every one and it still hurts.

Not an easy read - but a must read. A real must read.