Happy Hour Chat: What Can Be by Mary Calmes

Guess what time it is...??

It's Happy Hour Chat time!

*busts out the margaritas*

For today's Happy Hour Chat, we'll be chit chatting about What Can Be by Mary Calmes. Mary Calmes will be our February Author of the Month (and, OMG, you would not believe how much squeeing there was from a certain clubhouse contingent), so keep an eye out for more reviews of her work, plus an interview, later this month!


Warning: This chat will contain spoilers.



JL + Mary = 4eva: I KNEW he was in the WPP before I even read it. She uses it a lot in her books
Ann: Well, that's convenient - the WPP i mean
Sunny: MC= convenient
JL + Mary = 4eva: MC = awesome
Sméagol: MC = joy
Justin: MC = Crackwhore
JL + Mary = 4eva: yes!
JL + Mary = 4eva: no! J!
Sméagol: The best kinda crack there is.
Sméagol: :D
JL + Mary = 4eva: Jet, you better park your butt right here and talk about this book!
Ann: MC = overly dramatic drama with big beautiful gold digging drama queens
Sunny: Did you like anything about the story, Ann?
Justin: Yes Jet, and don't hold anything back
Ann: Ummmmmmm - hold please
Ann: The boyfriend dude was ok
Sunny: I liked Craig. I'd like a Craig. Billionaire fantasy guy who loves me.
Ann: The rest of them were looney tunes
JL + Mary = 4eva: Me too. I want a Craig Zhao
Sméagol: Craig was hot.
Ann: Except he kept telling everybody what to do.
Ann: Don't tell me how to live my life Craig Zhao!
Justin: You mean the almost billionaire that kept saying "mine"? That boyfriend?
Sunny: He was taking care of him!
Sméagol: He was all, "JakEli, cute the shit"
Sméagol: cut*
Sunny: because Jake was a mess
Ann: What the fuck was with step mommy? "Are you a billionaire" WTAF?
Sméagol: I hated the step mom. She's a bitch
JL + Mary = 4eva: Craig Zhao was awesome. Craig Zhao loved Jake/Eli so much. Did anyone else notice his name was always Craig Zhao in the book?
Ann: *pft*
Sméagol: I was not fooled

This was kind of a wild one, but if you think you're game, check out the rest of the chat after the jump (and take the fuck truck to pound town!).



Welcome to our Mary Calmes chat! Come, pull up a beautiful chair, grab a beautiful cocktail, and feast your eyes on our beauty! ;)



JL + Mary = 4eva: I KNEW he was in the WPP before I even read it. She uses it a lot in her books
Ann: Well, that's convenient - the WPP i mean
Sunny: MC= convenient
JL + Mary = 4eva: MC = awesome
Sméagol: MC = joy
Justin: MC = Crackwhore
JL + Mary = 4eva: yes!
JL + Mary = 4eva: no! J!
Sméagol: The best kinda crack there is.
Sméagol: :D
JL + Mary = 4eva: Jet, you better park your butt right here and talk about this book!
Ann: MC = overly dramatic drama with big beautiful gold digging drama queens
Sunny: Did you like anything about the story, Ann?
Justin: Yes Jet, and don't hold anything back
Ann: Ummmmmmm - hold please
Ann: The boyfriend dude was ok
Sunny: I liked Craig. I'd like a Craig. Billionaire fantasy guy who loves me.
Ann: The rest of them were looney tunes
JL + Mary = 4eva: Me too. I want a Craig Zhao
Sméagol: Craig was hot.
Ann: Except he kept telling everybody what to do.
Ann: Don't tell me how to live my life Craig Zhao!
Justin: You mean the almost billionaire that kept saying "mine"? That boyfriend?
Sunny: He was taking care of him!
Sméagol: He was all, "JakEli, cute the shit"
Sméagol: cut*
Sunny: because Jake was a mess
Ann: What the fuck was with step mommy? "Are you a billionaire" WTAF?
Sméagol: I hated the step mom. She's a bitch
JL + Mary = 4eva: Craig Zhao was awesome. Craig Zhao loved Jake/Eli so much. Did anyone else notice his name was always Craig Zhao in the book?
Ann: *pft*
Sméagol: I was not fooled
Audrey: *runs in with quick copy/paste of the blurb* Thirteen years ago, Eli went on a summer trip with his mother and never came back. Now, existing in a new life as Jacob Somerville, he’s again running from fear and memories, only to end up where he started. As Jacob struggles to reconnect with his father and brothers, he realizes that his lover, Craig Zhao, was the only thing filling his empty heart and standing between him and ghosts of the past. It will take the power of love—from his family, from Craig, and from himself—for Jacob to see that his life truly is filled with the promise of what can be.
Sunny: Step mom was weird
Audrey: I liked Craig, too.
Audrey: AND he's an Asian dude!!!!
Audrey: (I assume.)
JL + Mary = 4eva: You mean Craig Zhao?
Ann: hehehehe
Sméagol: So did I. Assume. Which is great
Ann: And, as J so handily pointed out, an "almost" billionaire
Sméagol: Craig Zhao getting his man and showing everyone who is boss
JL + Mary = 4eva: I didn't like the stepmom either. I think she was a gold digger. And a nosy Nellie
Sméagol: I also have a thing for billionaires
Justin: Come fly on my plane....Ack!
Audrey: The stepmom was weird as fuck.
Audrey: And so was the everyone-touches-each-other's-cheek thing.
Ann: And their napes, dont forget their napes
Audrey: And foreheads.
Ann: There was a lot of nape-touching
Sunny: I don't think she was supposed to bother people so much
Sunny: but she did
Ann: How come no one to told her to step the fuck off?
Sméagol: I would have
Sméagol: I would have told her to back up and off.
JL + Mary = 4eva: me too.
Justin: After I soothed Gillian, touching her cheek as I walked by.... WTF?
Ann: YES J!
Audrey: For real, J!!!
Sméagol: She was an odd duck.
Sunny: Jake was weird, too.
Ann: Ya think Sunshine?
JL + Mary = 4eva: C'mon J! That's classic Calmes right there!
Sméagol: JakEli (his new name) was skittish
Audrey: Jake/Eli kinda got on my nerves, too.
Audrey: JakEli!! You are brills, dear.
Ann: I would love it if she had done a kung fu block chop to the "caressing" That's what I would do
Justin: ,” he said, his fingers following a piece from my forehead all the way down to where it ended at my shoulders, in curls.
JL + Mary = 4eva: He had a traumatic past. Of course he was skittish
Justin: HE WAS BATFUCKINGSHIT CRAZY
Ann: But, he was beautiful. So, ya know, he had that going for him
Sunny: I don't like secret crap/melodrama...I say cut the shit, too
Audrey: All things said, I actually kinda liked it still. O________O
JL + Mary = 4eva: I liked it. :)
Audrey: If I looked at it from a "this is a soap opera of beautiful people with drama mama lives" perspective.
Sunny: I liked JakEli when he was with Craig. Craig makes everything better :)
Sméagol: I have a theory about him: He wasn't getting Craig D on the regular so after enter week 2, he ran. It's almost billionaire D withdrawal
Sméagol: Craig's da man aka Mr. Cut the Shit
JL + Mary = 4eva: hi 5 L!
Sunny: "I turned around in his arms and grabbed him as tight as I could, burying my face down in his shoulder. 'I’m a mess.' 'Yeah, but I like cleaning you up.' "
Audrey: Sunny, I liked that part! It was cute. :)
Sméagol: Aw.
JL + Mary = 4eva: yes Sunny!
Justin: GAG!
Sunny: lol...it was cute, J!
Ann: *snort*
JL + Mary = 4eva: and the part where he told Jake/Eli he was his safety net *swoon*
Sméagol: that was hot
Sunny: *double swoon*
Justin: I have whiplash and tennis eyeball from reading this hot mess
JL + Mary = 4eva: lalalalala I can't hear you J!
Sunny: I liked JakEli's brothers and dad. Their reactions to seeing him...that got me.
Audrey: I thought JakEli was funny/cute when he was bickering with his brothers.
Audrey: When Lucas said he knew JakEli was gay, etc.
Ann: Their reactions required medication
Sméagol: JakEli's brothers were cute at first and then they started acting like teen girls to me.
Justin: The dad's reaction didn't seem real to me at all
Sméagol: Just gabbing away. I was waiting for one of them to start asking to braid each other's hair and paint their toenails
Ann: Wasn't one of them a doctor?
JL + Mary = 4eva: I liked his brothers
Audrey: Yeah, a neurology doc or something. Chase, I think.
Ann: Shouldn't he KIND OF known NOT to pin down a person having a panic attack??????
Justin: YES ANN, EXACTLY!!
Ann: That was weird.
Ann: Really weird
JL + Mary = 4eva: I didn't like his mom though. Even though she fought for him in the end she was still a dirty little crack whore
Audrey: I was kind of pissed with what happened to the mom. And how the women in this book in general are not pleasant characters.
Sméagol: That was weird
Sunny: The mom story was OTT, and that the dad would let it happen
Ann: all the parents were AWOL from the get go
Justin: And then they all left the room so Jake/Eli and Craig could fuck
Sunny: that was weird, J...
Audrey: hahahahahhahaha, J
Audrey: EXACTLY
Ann: Fucking cures panic attacks J - DUH!
Sunny: I'm thinking the family would want to know he was okay
Sméagol: I didn't like how the stepmom tried to blame JakEli
Audrey: Magic billionaire peen!
Sméagol: The D is always winning
JL + Mary = 4eva: almost billionaire, you mean
Audrey: Excuse me, almost-billionaire.
Audrey: ;)
Ann: I bet he shoots golden jizz
JL + Mary = 4eva: jizz that tastes like sunshine
Justin: I gasped as a finger breached me, sliding into my tight, puckered hole.
Sméagol: buttsex
Sméagol: slurp
Ann: I'm guessing that's a quote J and not a description of your Friday
Sméagol: lmao
Justin: sorry "I gasped as a finger breached me, sliding into my tight, puckered hole."
Sunny: lmao, Ann!
Sméagol: like SUNNY D
Audrey: "You belong to me, Jake Somerville, and so does Eli Hartline. Both of you are mine." <--- Perfect Craig is perfect.
Sméagol: Yay Craig Zhao!
JL + Mary = 4eva: I FUCKING LOVE CRAIG ZHAO!
Justin: See all of that "mine" bullshit is nuts!
Sunny: I like it
Ann: Breaching Fingers is the name of my new band
Sméagol: "Mine" is da shit! Sméagol loveses
Audrey: I liked that one - it was cute. But then yeahhhh....there were like a dozen more "mine!!"s that seemed odd.
JL + Mary = 4eva: If a story has "mine!" in it you can pretty much guarantee that I'll love it.
Ann: I'm not a fan of the "mine" Makes me want to have a blind panic attack
Sunny: Ann, you are 100% top
Ann: *preens* I AM!
Sunny: :D
Justin: “I need you to fuck me,” I told him, my voice cracking. “’Cause I wanna belong to you.”
Sunny: JakEli was messed up, J
Audrey: But I liked that Craig Zhao owned up to his love/need for JakEli. And how he was scared of losing him. BUT...that also made me think he deserved better than JakEli and how JakEli treated him. >__>
Sméagol: Aw yeah!
Sunny: Agree, Audrey
Ann: Exactly. That pissed me off. Craig doesn't deserve that noise.
Sméagol: Okay, I have a question. Why in the world was JakEli even in California?
Sunny: You are looking for logic, L?
Ann: hahahaha Sunny!
JL + Mary = 4eva: Cause he finally figured it was time to see his family
Audrey: hahhahahahaha, Sunny :)
Justin: bingo Sunshine
Sméagol: Like he's supposed to be in the program, doesn't want to see his family...like whut
Sméagol: I try to tone done the logic but that question is burning my mind. :D
Sunny: It really wasn't clear...but I don't think it was clear in his mind, either
Ann: But the bad dude got shanked in the big house and now he's all safe and shit so he can go to the promised land and drink Sunny D jizz and stuff
Audrey: It's what JL said...I think. BUT...it's not clear whether he knew the bad dude was no longer a threat to him.
Sméagol: I'll use the needing the almost billionaire D withdrawal
Justin: His mom led him to CA and that gas station, remember?
Ann: Or something to that affect
Audrey: Oh yeahhh, it took like a paranormal turn there, didn't it, J? :D
Justin: I wondered if somehow my mother had led me there, led Chase there, and even though I knew it wasn’t really possible, I thought about it nonetheless.
JL + Mary = 4eva: Mary Calmes is brain candy. You aren't supposed to think too hard when reading her stuff. Just go with the flow and enjoy the ride. :D
Ann: I dont think i'd listen to my dead crackwhore mother
Sméagol: Holy shit...I forgot this is a Christmas jizz story. Rules don't apply. My bad
Justin: It wasn't even Christmas jizz. that was just thrown in so it could be added to the Christmas collection
Sméagol: (Thank goodness for that. I was not ready to swallow more Jizzmas loads)
Sunny: We need to work on that, L...it's why I gave you a Santa tin ;)
Sméagol: LMAO - tin's awesome, what was inside even awesomer
Audrey: Awwww, are you a little Scrooge-like over the MC, J? :)
Sunny: Did you like anything about it, J?
Justin: Yes Audrey! *pouts* This whole book pissed me the fuck off!
Sunny: I would have liked it a lot better if his mom hadn't been so awful, not counting her last minute attempt to protect him.
Audrey: Agreed, Sunny. The vilifying the mom thing left a bad taste in my mouth.
Audrey: Not sunshiny or pepperminty tasting at all.
Ann: Mmmmmmm - jizzmas, tastes pepperminty
Sméagol: It was full of Craig's jizz, tasted like Sunny D
Justin: I did like one small part: “I think everything with you is complicated.” Lucas snorted and Chase nodded. “You do seem a trifle high maintenance.” HAHAHA that was funny
Ann: billionaire jizz = Sunny D, good to know
Ann: I highlighted that one J!!!!!!!
JL + Mary = 4eva: Wait, who was it that suggested we read this one?
Ann: hehehehehe - jem!
Justin: I take full responsibility for this HUGE mistake.
Ann: I stand corrected
Sméagol: almost billionaire jizz tastes like Sunny D. Billionaire jizz tastes like money
Audrey: billionaire jizz tastes like cashmere feels
Ann: poor choices taste like bitter jizz
Justin: bitter jizz tastes better than this crap
JL + Mary = 4eva: It wasn't a mistake to me, J. I liked this one. I gave it 4 stars. :D
Audrey: I'm shocked to report I mostly liked it, too. Like...3-3.5 stars-ish!
JL + Mary = 4eva: It even gave me a case of the feels in some places.
Sméagol: The story was solid to me. Even with JakEli being hopped up on missing the D and the stepmom = 3.5
Audrey: P.S. Your screenname is a winner, JL. ;)
Sméagol: It truly is JL
JL + Mary = 4eva: I might have even shed a tear or two
Sunny: I liked it, even with the weird parts
Ann: I totally get why people like it, it's just not what works for me
JL + Mary = 4eva: I love my screen name. :)
Ann: Cuz you're Jem and you're having a middle school yearbook flashback
Justin: JL, I hope you and MC have a long happy life together. i'll send a wedding gift when I get the announcement
JL + Mary =  4eva: I think it was because of reading Sparkly Pens too many times is how I thought of my screen name
Sméagol: SPARKLY PENS!!!!!!!!!!!
Audrey: Sparkly pens is adorbs!! I've had it saved for ages and go back to it for happy feels. <3
JL + Mary =  4eva: I read it again today. That is my fave Sterek
Sméagol: Not my fave Calmes but it was good. (see: Mine & Acrobat)
Sunny: Mine & Frog
Sméagol: MC! MC! MC!
Justin: The Timing audiobook was high drama times 10
JL + Mary = 4eva: Change of Heart will always be my favorite. It was my first Calmes book and it's about shifters!
Audrey: I can't help but chuckle over the "oh, we'll just take my plane" thing. BWAHAHAHHAHAA.
Ann: He's an almost billionaire, he's got spare planes
Justin: Audrey I permanently damaged my eyeballs when i read that
Sunny: Fantasy Billionaire Guy...
Sunny: It's like a harlequin
Sméagol: = yay
Ann: yeeeeesh
Audrey: hahahahahhaa, J, let me just pull that spare plane out of my pocket.
Justin: And this was just creepy: “Eli,” she cried. “Oh sweetheart, you lived, and what an amazing, perfect Christmas gift that is for your father. You came home. Thank you.”
Sunny: *shudders* weird
Audrey: Weird stepmom is weird.
Audrey: Stepford-weird.
Ann: She was fucking weird.
Sunny: lol...I was just typing stepford mom!
Sméagol: I didn't like Gillian. She can go kick rocks
Justin: I would have told mommy dearest to "BACK THAT FUCK OFF MY GRILL"
Ann: HAHAHAHA - Stallion said "grill"
Sméagol: Craig should have been there to kill that noise
Audrey: But yeah....that whole drama mama thing (literally drama mama) was a little too crazy for me.
Ann: I don't do drama
Audrey: Stallion would've shaken his tail and swatted her with a hoof.
Sméagol: I'd have loved to watch that
Ann: And stabbed her in the pearls with his horn
Justin: I'd have thumped her between the eyes
JL + Mary = 4eva: I was a little disappointed there was only one mention of outerwear in the whole book. Only a fleece lined demin jacket. No peacoats to be found anywhere! :(
Ann: Is outerwear a big thing?
JL + Mary = 4eva: Yep
Ann: Well, it was California
Ann: We don't really do outerwear
Ann: Maybe a lite hoody now and again
JL + Mary = 4eva: But isn't it Northern California? Where it's a bit colder?
Justin: i read woody
Audrey: It's colder up here, yeah.
Sméagol: hahahahahah
Audrey: hahahahha
Audrey: Woody. ;)
Justin: maybe a little woody now and then'
Audrey: Or a big woody, eh?
Ann: Of course you did J!
Audrey: A heavy woody.
Audrey: A thick woody.
Justin: an outer woody
Ann: A fucking battering ram
Sméagol: Pound Town!
Justin: to go in his flutterimg hole
Justin: fluttering
JL + Mary = 4eva: NO FLUTTERING HOLES!
Audrey: oh oh! Excuse you, this time it was a SPASMING hole.
Sunny: omg...I can't stop laughing!
Audrey: I remember reading that specifically. Not fluttering.
Ann: He did, literally, drive his mother's fuck truck to pound town
Sméagol: As long as it wasn't a palsied channel, it's fine
Justin: tight, puckered fluttering hole
Audrey: hahahhahahahahahahahahahhaha
Ann: It did get breached though
Audrey: fuck truck to pound town!
Sunny: ...and we came full circle again ;)
JL + Mary = 4eva: No. FLUTTERING.
JL + Mary = 4eva: HOLES!
Sméagol: He did. Ah the good ol' fuck truck. It always delivers
Justin: buttsex!
Ann: Took the 69 train to HUMPSville Station!
Audrey: (__|__)
Sméagol: The buttsex
JL + Mary = 4eva: Heh heh,
Audrey: hehehehe, I ummm...think we might be wrapping up, yeah?
Audrey: Any last thoughts on "What Can Be" by Mary Calmes? :)
Justin: I'm done!
JL + Mary = 4eva: So, this one was a success? Yes, I think it was
Sunny: I think so, too, JL!
Sunny: :D
Ann: As long as Jem and L are happy, I is happy
Justin: This was a fucked up mess, that's what this was.
Sunny: *hugs*
Audrey: Hey, at least they bathed this time, J! :D
Ann: Someone needs a breaching
Sméagol: *smooches Jet*
Justin: Did they?
Sunny: yeah, not as good as Viking stories, right J?
Audrey: I'll bet the spare plane even has a shower on board.
Ann: (((HUGS L)))
Ann: a full hug too - none of that sideways BS
Sméagol: lmao
Ann: Damn, I love a good Viking story. Bring me a thrall!!!!!!!!!!





Whew! Where can we get an almost billionaire Craig Zhao for ourselves?

Thanks for stopping by for our February Happy Hour Chat! Let us know if you have any beautiful thoughts in the comments!

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