Review: Regret (Under My Skin, #1) by Christina Lee

When Brian “Brin” Schubert’s condo floods, he takes his co-worker up on the offer to stay on his crappy futon for a while. The last thing he expects is for his friend’s roommate to be the one guy he despises the most. The same guy who stomped on his heart senior year of high school. And by the looks of the girl on his arm, the same man who’s still deep inside the closet.

Nicholas Dell never predicted that eleven years later, one of his greatest regrets would show up on his doorstep down on his luck. Nick has made some terrible mistakes—story of his life—and he’s been paying for them ever since. And if the guilt and shame aren’t enough, his first crush had to turn into one of the sexiest men he’s ever laid eyes on.

Nick and Brin have weeks to steer clear of each other. Weeks to avoid strangling each other. But when stubbornness leads to skyrocketing sexual tension, hate-sex doesn’t seem like such an awful way to work through their frustration. Except hate is a powerful emotion, especially when it’s turned inward. And in Nick’s case he’s been drowning in a sea of self-loathing for so long, he can’t see his way out.

As Brin reconnects with Nick, his perception of what really happened in their past begins to change. He’s finally ready to forgive him and take a second chance on the one guy who stirs him like no other. But Nick’s demons are complicated, heart-wrenching…demanding. So devastating, he might never allow himself true happiness—even with the one man who’s always owned his heart. 

Alright. Lemme just have my Stuart Smalley moment here and fess up.

Hi! My name is Cupcake and I'm a sap. It's official after this read because Regret is sappy and if someone had handed me a biscuit I would've used it to sop the excess schmaltz off my kindle. Like a glutton. I flew through it too. I looked after what seemed like a couple minutes and was over 30%; the next thing I knew it said "the end" and now I'm jonesin' for more. Admittedly there were a couple moments wherein I actually recognized the sap may be being laid on a little thick but... *shrugs* 

So if there's some sort of sash or crown then someone can start fitting it out for me with extra bedazzling, please and thank you.

"You were my only source of light. Seeing you, talking to you... it filled me up, gave me something to look forward to every single day. I felt lost, otherwise."

Brin and Nick went to high school together. Brin was a geek/nerd to Nick's jock but they had something until something bad happened and Brin couldn't forgive Nick for it. Skip forward 11 years and a burst pipe in Brin's apartment lands him on his best friend Elijah's futon temporarily. Guess who's Elijah's roommate?

The bad thing that happened in high school was pretty bad by high school standards so I get Brin's wariness towards Nick, but I grappled with this grudge he holds. Sometimes you just have to Frozen that shit and this seemed like one of those times. 11 years, bro!

Nevertheless, Brin hasn't let it go and he makes Nick work for it even though he's still attracted to him and there's still clearly something between them.

Nick... *sigh* he's been through the wringer. Poor guy. I really felt for him, like, a lot. He's trying to do all the right things for all the right people, pretending to be someone he's not to make others happy and he's making himself miserable along the way. The road ahead looks bleak and lonely as hell so it's no wonder he struggles with depression and anxiety. Plus, he's carrying the weight of the world in the form of a childhood tragedy. He's getting professional help but he also needs someone to be on his side. And he really wants that person to be Brin even though he doesn't think he deserves him. He knows he fucked up and he does whatever's in his power to show Brin he's changed and how much regret he carries. Truth be told, Brin could never beat Nick up more than he beats himself up. Once Brin starts to recognize what's going on things begin to change. 

Lee did a commendable job with both of these characters, fleshing them out, making them relatable, heartfelt and genuine. This narrative and the dialogue flow easily and hooked me into this story immediately. The prose isn't polished-several words or phrases were used repeatedly. For example, Brin keeps referring to himself as a "needy bottom" and he has a "deep craving" which I kept thinking was some sort of kink and was starting to bounce a lil bit trying to guess what it was. But it turns out his "deep craving" is he needs an emotional connection with his lovers. I'm not sure how him preferring to bottom factors into that since Nick seems to need/want the same and he's a top so...

The sex while hot I wouldn't necessarily categorize as hate sex either. Maybe "hate sex" is more apropos. Though the face fucking scene... *stares off into space* Ahem. I'm not mad at it. Not at all.

The secondary characters are reasonably well developed and I'm REALLY hoping the next book features Tristan. And more dogs like Tally!!! Tally stole the show more than once. I'm not quite sure what to make of Elijah at this point. His boyfriend seems likes he's circling the controlling douchecanoe block which made me feel sorry for him, but he seems cool with it so who am I to judge? However I did find his investment in Nick and Brin bizarre. It tipped the nosiness line into weirdness and had my facial region doing some gymnastics. The family dynamics of both Brin and Nick were truly heartwarming though, even the awkward stuff with Brin's dad.

I'd never heard of Christina Lee prior to this request, but my first experience was certainly a success. She sure does know how to deliver a sparkling HEA that punched me in the feels and has me amped up to read the bejeezus out of the next one.

So thorough, yet overwhelmingly so-like he was trying to climb inside me and live there for a while. Little did he realize he already fucking did.

If you're a fan of second chance romances that are heavy on angst, new adult or are a sap like me I think you'll enjoy Regret.

A review copy was provided.

Review: True Colors by Anyta Sunday

Oskar used to be Marco’s best friend. His everything. His sunshine yellow.

But that was before. Before Marco stopped being a hot jock. Before he learned to live with scars and pain. And before Oskar tore their friendship apart.

Now the boy next door has returned home, determined to rekindle his friendship with Marco, and Marco’s more afraid than ever. Afraid of getting hurt. Afraid of being humiliated.

Afraid of falling in love. 

Can Oskar find a way through Marco’s fear, back into his heart?

Heartwarming

True Colors is a friends to enemies to lovers story that's sure to pull on the heartstrings of even the most cynical reader. Marco and Oskar grew up together, were the best of friends who spent countless hours together doing nothing and everything. One fateful day tragedy strikes Marco's family which forever alters the landscape of his life.

Thankfully he still has the support of his best friend until an event in a boys locker room turned his best friend into his enemy and shattered a piece of his soul along the way.

This is a slow burn told in Sunday's unique style with some flashbacks to explain the hurt. The comfort is delivered in spades but requires patience.

Told from both of their perspectives which gave each of these characters depth and gave the story poignancy. I appreciated Oskar's perspective to truly understand his actions and to invest in them as a couple because what Oskar did was awful. I'm glad it wasn't glossed over and that Marco doesn't capitulate at the first apology. Oskar needed to prove himself worthy of Marco more than once, for me.

What resonated the most was how much of an impact hurtful words can have on someone's psyche. The foundation of Marco's self-image was damaged in that locker room and that's not something he can recover from easily, nor can he ignore that Oskar is still under his skin. It's clear Marco's still has strong feelings for his first love and erstwhile best friend. More than just animosity too.

When he returns to Berlin with a boyfriend all those feelings become harder to ignore. He does try though. As you know, I have a thing for the possessive ones and Oskar is not happy about all of Marco's "trying". I liked that Sunday went this direction with his characterization because it makes it abundantly clear that the shadow of Marco casts a long shadow.

The secondary characters and family dynamics added tension and pushed the narrative forward. Zoe and how protective they are of her was entertaining. Grandpa a.k.a. Grandmaster Scrabbler cracked me up with his grunting. I feel like he's an oracle, but a non-verbal one. And I really REALLY loved when Marco finally comes out and everyone being like, 'yeah, we know'.

There isn't an excessive amount of sex, as you might expect with this trope. But in its place is oodles of longing, desire and romance to satisfy most readers. 

This may sound hokey but I have to mention how much I LOVED all the fonts and the colors, how Marco uses those colors and how colors are integral to his character. It's uncommon and maybe a little quirky but I really enjoyed it.

Recommended! 

A review copy was provided by NetGalley.

Find out more on Goodreads.

Review: The Boy Next Door by Kate McMurray

Life is full of surprises and, with luck, second chances.

After his father’s death, Lowell leaves the big city to help his sick mother in the conservative small town where he grew up. He’s shocked to find himself living next to none other than his childhood friend Jase. Lowell always had a crush on Jase, and the man has only gotten more attractive with age. Unfortunately Jase is straight, now divorced, and raising his six-year-old daughter. It’s nice to reconnect, but Lowell doesn’t see a chance for anything beyond friendship.

Until a night out together changes everything.

Jase can’t fight his growing feelings for Lowell, and he doesn’t want to give up the happy future they could have. But his ex-wife issues an ultimatum: he must keep his homosexuality secret or she’ll revoke his custody of their daughter, Layla. Now Jase faces an impossible choice: Lowell and the love he’s always wanted, or his daughter. 

I liked the premise. The writing was good. But I was left feeling underwhelmed by Lowell and Jase's romance. 

When Lowell moved back to his hometown to take care of his mother, he had no idea he was moving right next door to his childhood friend. Lowell and Jase were friends when they were kids but they had a falling out after their friendship had the potential to turn into more. Jase kind of freaked and that was the end of their friendship. Until years later when Lowell moved right next door to him and his daughter. 

Jase was very securely in the closet (except to a few "family" members) but he had a hard time staying there after being around Lowell so much. Their friendship picked up pretty quickly, considering how badly it had ended originally, and things escalated to sex very fast. They were good together. They were fine. Nothing exciting though. I just... didn't really feel it, ya know? 

And then there's some drama that I just had to roll my eyes at. Jase was a father and, of course, he wanted to protect his daughter. But he's also an adult and common sense and logic should come into play. He was too irrational and let his ex-wife control him too much. I didn't connect with him and his choices made him very unlikable to me. 

I loved the daughter. She was a sweet character and I liked her bond with Lowell. They were very cute and, even if I didn't particularly like Jase, I could see them all being a very loving family together.

There was a little bit of a secondary romance going on, too. It felt really open-ended and unfinished. So many unanswered questions. Are my guesses correct? Tell me what happened with them! I need to know! I think I liked them more than the main couple. 

The Boy Next Door was a well-written, nicely paced romance. It didn't quite hit the mark for me, but I'll still be checking out more Kate McMurray in the future.

A copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.

Find out more info on Goodreads and Dreamspinner Press.

Release Day Review: Hanging The Stars (Half Moon Bay #2) by Rhys Ford

Angel Daniels grew up hard, one step ahead of the law and always looking over his shoulder. A grifter’s son, he’d learned every con and trick in the book but ached for a normal life. Once out on his own, Angel returns to Half Moon Bay where he once found…and then lost…love.

Now, Angel’s life is a frantic mess of schedules and chaos. Between running his bakery and raising his troubled eleven-year-old half-brother, Roman, Angel has a hectic but happy life. Then West Harris returns to Half Moon Bay and threatens to break Angel all over again by taking away the only home he and Rome ever had.

When they were young, Angel taught West how to love and laugh but when Angel moved on, West locked his heart up and threw away the key. Older and hardened, West returns to Half Moon and finds himself face-to-face with the man he’d lost. Now, West is torn between killing Angel or holding him tight.

But rekindling their passionate relationship is jeopardized as someone wants one or both of them dead, and as the terrifying danger mounts, neither man knows if the menace will bring them together or forever tear them apart.

I’ve been waiting for this story for what seems like forever!  Ever since it was hinted in Fish Stick Fridays that West’s story was next I’ve been on tenterhooks.  I just knew it was going to be great!  And I was sooo right.  From the moment I opened to the first page I was caught up in the storytelling.  Rhys dug her claws in and did not let go until the very end.    

I fell in love with Angel almost immediately.  He’s worked so hard to keep his business, the Pizza Shack Bakery, afloat whilst taking care of his 11-year-old brother Roman who was foisted on him by their father a couple of years ago, plus managing the motel next door.  He works night and day, plodding along, just trying to keep ends met.  On top of all that he’s having to deal with some big company trying to get him to sell everything so they can tear it down to make way for some high dollar condos.  He’s so tired, just run ragged by life in general.  So, it’s no wonder that when some moron comes barreling into the bakery kitchen brandishing a gun that he gets a little unhinged.

“Are you going to get on with the shooting me?  Cause if you are, do it soon, because this is getting kind of heavy.”

Poor thing is so exhausted I wanted to lead him into a dark room, wrap him up in a soft blanket and just let him take a nap.  He just can’t get a break.  

Now West… West surprised me.  He wasn’t anything like I expected.  When I met him in Fish Stick Fridays I disliked him immediately.  Frankly, I thought he was a complete douche.  But, I have total faith in Rhys Ford as a writer so I was eager to see how she would redeem him.  He was still a douche when introduced into this story but as I got further into the story I began to see the caring, compassionate man hiding underneath all that pomp and circumstance.  For most of his life West kept everyone, even his own twin brother, at arms-length, never letting anyone in close enough to see himself truly.  That was, until Zig came along.  Oh, West has such a soft spot for his niece!  It was so heartwarming to watch as he interacted with her.  

For all the distance he’d wanted to put between himself and Lang’s new family, West simply couldn’t walk away from the little girl who dreamed of ruling the world but still hid tins of food under a pile of stuffed animals just in case her world fell apart… again.

This was a fast-paced adventure riddled with murder, mystery, humor and romance.  It was a book about second chances, not just in love but in family and life in general.  I started reading this two days before the election and being able to get lost in this story and forget about all the insanity for a little while really helped me get through the horror that was going on in real life.

Speaking of horror, this book has the vilest, most despicable villain I’ve read about in a while.  I’m trying to think of a good word to describe how I felt about the villain and what comes to mind the most is appalled.  Disgusted.  This character was absolutely revolting!  I could barely believe what I was reading.  To think that there really are people out there in the world who are like this is truly terrifying.

Once again, Rhys Ford has hit it out of the ballpark.  The writing was, as per usual, exemplary and every character, even the secondary and tertiary ones, were just full of life and, well, character.  My only issue was with the ending.  I needed just a little bit more out of the climax of the story.  I wanted to see what happened next but when I turned the page it wasn’t there.  Yes, it was explained in the epilogue and that was good but I wanted to see it.  Everything else about this story was pretty much perfect.  This was an intense ride and I can’t wait to see what Rhys does next!

Find it at Dreamspinner Press and on Goodreads!

ARC provided for an honest review.

Review: Commitment Ranch (Leaning N #1) by BA Tortuga

A fist fight, a snowstorm, a stolen kiss in the barn... and a second chance at love.

Ford Nixel has two law offices, two fancy condominiums, and all the right connections. In short, he has everything he wants.

The last thing he needs is his Uncle Ty’s stake in the Leaning N, a ranch that’s been in the family for generations. Ford hasn’t even been to the ranch in over a decade, not since he left his boyfriend Stoney behind and headed back to college alone.

Ford arrives at the Leaning N to find Stoney, now a single father, right where he left him. A fist fight, a snowstorm, and a stolen kiss in the barn later—Ford knows none of the heat between them has dissipated.

Ford and Stoney’s college romance ended badly. Stoney ended up working at Ford’s uncle’s ranch and marrying Ford’s cousin, while Ford left the ranch and never looked back. But a call from his ailing uncle brings Ford back to the Leaning N, and back to Stoney, now a single father. They’re less than happy to see each other.

Ford believes that Stoney used him to get a share of the ranch, while Stoney thinks that Ford left him because he wasn’t good enough for an up-and-coming lawyer. The two bicker repeatedly, but have to put aside the animosity if they want to save the ranch. They can only deny for so long that underneath the anger, the mutual attraction still burns strong.

For the first half of the book, I wasn’t a fan of either Ford or Stoney. Both were very immature, making each others’ lives, and their own, miserable. It was miscommunication galore.

But things improved considerably in the second half, and I ended up genuinely enjoying the book. The big reveal about what actually happened when Stoney and Ford broke up went a long way in making up for the drama! The reveal wasn’t OTT, but it kept with the Dreamspun Desires harlequin themes.

I may not have been so happy with how Stoney acted around Ford, but I was definitely swooning over how Stoney took such good care of Quartz, his nine-year-old son. It made some of his actions understandable, given that his first priority is providing for Quartz.

On the other hand, it took me well into the book to warm up to Ford. He did a pretty good job maintaining his persona of the cold and detached lawyer. It takes him a while, but Ford does eventually start letting his guard down.

I liked seeing how it was Stoney who brought Ford out of his self-constructed shell. The two MCs may have been at each other’s throats for most of the first half, but it became pretty clear that they still cared for one another. Once I got to see them without all the anger and hurt, I could easily understand why Ford and Stoney belonged together.

Steam-wise, this is a very tame book. I was a tad let-down, because this author usually delivers in the smexin’ department, and because the sexual tension between the MCs was killer.

I very much enjoyed ranch setting. The secondary characters who call the ranch home all added to the story, and provided some comedic relief. Plus, I’m a sucker for a countryside winter!

Overall, I liked ‘Commitment Ranch’. The beginning was rough, but it steadily got better. If you’re looking for a book with a lovers-to-enemies-to-lovers trope, give this book a try.

For more info on Dreamspinner Press or Goodreads!

Audiobook Review: Fever Pitch (Love Lessons #2) by Heidi Cullinan

Sometimes you have to play love by ear.

Aaron Seavers is a pathetic mess, and he knows it. He lives in terror of incurring his father’s wrath and disappointing his mother, and he can’t stop dithering about where to go to college—with fall term only weeks away. Ditched by a friend at a miserable summer farewell party, all he can do is get drunk in the laundry room and regret he was ever born. Until a geeky-cute classmate lifts his spirits, leaving him confident of two things: his sexual orientation, and where he’s headed to school.

Giles Mulder can’t wait to get the hell out of Oak Grove, Minnesota, and off to college, where he plans to play his violin and figure out what he wants to be when he grows up. But when Aaron appears on campus, memories of hometown hazing threaten what he’d hoped would be his haven. As the semester wears on, their attraction crescendos from double-cautious to a rich, swelling chord. But if more than one set of controlling parents have their way, the music of their love could come to a shattering end.

Warning: Contains showmances, bad parenting, Walter Lucas, and a cappella.

Cute, cute, CUTE. 

Oh my cuteness.

Giles and Aaron's slow burn, enemies to lovers story was basically perfect.

Giles went away to college in hopes of leaving behind all the crap he dealt with in high school. Then, right away, he sees Aaron. A guy who he thinks used him, just like all the others, from his high school. Kinda rained on his parade. Of course, Aaron was actually there because he liked Giles, but Giles was too bitter to even contemplate that thought.

When Aaron first arrives at college, much to his dismay, Giles doesn't give him the warm welcome he was hoping for. Giles just delivers the death stare and Aaron gets the message loud and clear. On top of that, his roommate, Elijah (oh, Elijah) is totally rude and weird, with friends that wear anti-gay shirts all the time. Although he doesn't get Giles, eventually, Aaron does find his place at college.

I'd usually be totally against a Big Misunderstanding for this much of a story, but not only did it make complete sense, there was a whole cast of amazing characters to amuse me while I waited for Aaron and Giles to happen. Really, I could listen to a book about this group of college students even if there wasn't any romance. They are that good. Especially Walter. Be still my heart, Walter. He makes me melt all over with his fierce loyalty and all-consuming love for the people in his life.

Both Aaron and Giles go about their business, actively avoiding each other, until circumstances bring them together. They can ignore each other's existence no more. Their tentative friendship was so cute, mostly because they were trying so hard not to jump all over each other the whole time. But then, it finally happened.

The Kiss.

Good-NESS, Ms. Heidi Cullinan made them work for it. This was no "I think you're cute, let me kiss you" deal. No, there was angst and tension surrounding their first kiss and it was delicious. Thick, delicious tension. #nomnomnom

Then they were together and oh-so-adorable and forced a huge, sappy grin on my face.

I loved Aaron and Giles. I loved the music. I especially loved Elijah. I especially, especially loved Walter. I especially, especially, especially loved Iggy Toma's narrating.

I think I said this for Love Lessons: I'm sure this was great in print, but I have to recommend the audio. The narration was flawless and one of the best I've listened to.

I really want to rush out and read Lonely Hearts as soon as it's available, but I'm going to have to wait for the audio to get the full experience I think.  

Iggy Toma reading Heidi's words is... everything.

A copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.

Find out more info on Goodreads!

Review: 500 Kisses to Steal a Heart by Anyta Sunday

“… Five hundred kisses are all it takes to steal a heart.” Chris Montgomery doesn’t believe it, and he’d know. He’s met— and had— many a man. None of whom he’d want to share five hundred kisses with. If you don’t like someone, you just don’t like them. End of story. No amount of kissing will change that. Dylan Halsworth doesn’t believe it either. But Chris and his arrogant, “always right, dare I be wrong” attitude has Dylan challenging him to try it. And who knows, maybe watching his most-loathed neighbor suffer through five hundred kisses with the same man is worth it? He’d sit back, crack open a Mountain Dew, and have a good laugh… But… shit… there is one slight snag in his plan. Chris has chosen Dylan with whom to prove his point…

This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Love’s Landscapes" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.

Photo Description: Two men are sitting close, a whisper apart, and their gazes are locked onto each other’s lips. The light glows behind them, bright, like the chemistry between them. They are about to kiss…

This story may contain sexually explicit content and is intended for adult readers. It may contain content that is disagreeable or distressing to some readers. The M/M Romance Group strongly recommends that each reader review the General Information section before each story for story tags as well as for content warnings.

Have I ever told you I’m a recovering Mountain Dew addict? I’ve fallen off the wagon 4 times. FOUR! It’s like I can go so long and then one day I’ll find myself standing in line and I see those temptingly, fresh, eerily neon green yellow nectar of the Gods bottles looking at me with such longing in their cooler case and I can’t stop myself. Weak willed, I am. Seriously. Quitting smoking was easier than quitting The Dew. Thus, whenever I see commercials or someone mentions The Dew like in 500 Kisses to Steal a Heart it simultaneously makes me cringe and salivate. Like a Pavlovian dog. God, I wish I had one RIGHT NOW.

Look at that! It's just mocking me. 
*grumbles*
*groans*
*starts to get a little shaky*

Damn you, Anyta Sunday!!! Why does it have to be the ONLY thing they drink?!?!?!
I felt my resolve beginning to crack from the “crisp and delicious” description alone.

Focus, Cupcake!

Aside from the gratuitous, and in my opinion torturous, Mountain Dew references I enjoyed this story. It's my first experience with Ms. Sunday. I believe she usually writes YA which, let's call a spade a spade, ain't my usual cuppa. She probably does it quite well. Chris and Dylan's complicated relationship began when they were teens and they're working with teens at a summer camp now. She seems to have a good grasp of teen angst. The flashbacks of Chris and Dylan's early relationship helped the storyline and made the conflict credible.

My first thought when they made this bet was 'oh, that's silly' followed shortly thereafter by 'ohhhhhhh, they are boys, though, so yeah…'. They compete over everything! Boys. *smh* I did fine it amusing. Can't lie. Especially the diving for cellophane,Twister and the pull up contest.

I liked that they their road wasn't smooth, that one or both didn't capitulate after 5 minutes and that they, well, Dylan put his big girl panties on (<---see what I did there?) and faced their past head on even if he had to resort to some unorthodox methods. I particularly liked Chris's characterization. AND I really liked the somewhat surprising sexy times that were quite unexpected from a YA author.

*meow*
I can't say that I'd definitely read something else by this author since YA really isn't my thing, but I did enjoy this story. She did a fantastic job with the prompt and I thank her for participating.

ADDENDUM:  It was brought to my attention subsequent to writing this review that Ms. Sunday is NOT in fact a YA author. Mea culpa.

Review previously posted on GoodReads.