Dear Art,
I’m sure you get messages like this all the time but I feel like I don’t even know who I am anymore. I suppose I should start from the beginning... Three weeks ago, I saw puppy play for the first time and now I can’t stop obsessing about it. Wait, no, that’s not really the beginning...Ten years ago, my best friend who I’d been in love with my entire life told me he loved me too.
For ten years I’ve been living in complete bliss with Lars, the man of my dreams. Don’t get me wrong, we have our fights and disagreements (mostly because I do irritating shit and every once in awhile he reaches the end of his patience), but he is my other half in every way. I didn’t know I could love someone the way I love him.
Then, three weeks ago, I saw puppy play for the first time and now I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s not so different from when I realized I was gay, there was a moment where everything sort of clicked into place and my whole body was like “yes, THAT’S what we’ve been trying to figure out all this time.” At first I thought maybe I should just let it go because it’s not the kind of thing I can imagine my partner being into. But last week I went into a kink shop and ended up walking out with a puppy hood. I stashed it in our guest bedroom closet and haven’t even had the courage to take it out and try it on again, let alone show it to Lars. I don’t know what to do. How do I bring this up to him? And what if he isn’t into it? I feel like I don’t recognize myself anymore and I don’t know where to turn. Please help.
Sincerely,
One Lost Puppy
Reviewer: Annery
I’ve thought long and hard about this review. What to say, that doesn’t come off as harsh or petty, because really there isn’t anything objectionable about the story. It’s constituent parts are like a list of some of my favorite things, including a flipping of expectations when it comes to D/s relationships. Maybe I’ll start there, with what I liked and what worked for me. Small mercies.
Lars and Jonah are what Lars himself calls “lifers”. Their moms are best friends who were pregnant at the same time leading to the guys being BFFs since infancy, though their romantic involvement didn’t come until they were twenty-five. When the book starts they’ve been together for 10 years and are everything but married. Lars is a veterinarian and Jonah is an emergency room doctor, they share a home, a life, and a deep love rooted in friendship and familiarity of the best kind. Jonah is a big strapping ginger, a head taller than Lars, but he’s also bit of a playful goof who likes to dance around the house and ruffle his partner’s more serious personality. Perhaps it’s a way of letting off steam from a stressful job, but it’s also an aspect of their, heretofore, unacknowledged D/s relationship, as Jonah says:
”I’m nearly twice Lars’ weight and more than a head taller than he is. Granted, I do top more often than not, but that doesn’t mean I’m in control.”
Lars is fairly regimented. He likes order and everything in its place, but he also loves Jonah fiercely and makes sure of his well being. The love of between these two is another check in the plus column but it’s also is a good starting point for the this wasn’t for me column.
If you like your characters to have pretty much zero conflict between themselves and the world at large, this book is for you. If you like your MCs to say “I love you” and “anything you feel or want is good, valid, and I’m on-board with it” every five seconds, this book is for you. If you believe that the introduction of a major life change should present zero ambivalence in an established couple, this book is for you. I’ll have to demur.
One sunny day Lars & Jonah go to a Pride Parade and they come across some Puppies and their Masters. Jonah is more than a little intrigued by the group:
One of the men is dressed in a dog mask with black leather harness on his chest, and a pair of underwear with a bone on the ass and the word woof printed inside the bone. He’s naked aside from that, but honestly, that’s not the part that shocks or draws my attention, he’s hardly the least dressed person in the crowd. It’s the joy shining in his eye as he wiggles and starts to wrestle with another man dressed similarly. It’s the absolute inhibition as he lets out a happy bark like he doesn’t have a care in the world, and it’s the way the man holding his leash smiles at him with warmth and love. (btw, I’m pretty sure it should be *lack of inhibition*)
So that’s fine, right? Sometimes we suddenly find something that just clicks with us, but Jonah takes this to a whole new level. It’s suddenly the thing he always needed but never knew about. There’s reference to him having dabbled briefly in BDSM during college, before he and Lars became an item, but apparently he never pursued it further and puppies had never been on his radar. Really? Odd, I know all about them, but okay, I’ll buy it. That’s not what made me have to read this with a squinty eye, it’s the fact of his immediate quasi obsession with the kink and then his reluctance to talk to Lars about it. After the almost diabetic coma inducing protestations of love and acceptance between these two it was a tough pill to swallow. Sure, Lars makes an off the cuff remark about puppies being weird, when they first spot them at the parade, but wouldn’t anyone who isn’t into that lifestyle? They are weird. I think that is, and should be, a point of pride for folks in the kink community. And this is the heart of my dislike of this story, it’s so eager to tell us it’s okay to like what you like and be who you are (not a point I disagree with) that it treats kink like apple pie, chocolate chip cookies, and vanilla ice cream. It’s that thing where you take something you love and try to tame and polish it to the point where you can’t recognize in it the reasons you loved it in the first place. The weirdness, uniqueness, and non-conformity are domesticated to unobtrusively fit in with square or proper society. It’s taking a cat, a creature that’s two meals away from being feral, having lost none of its shared traits with larger felines, you make it a housecat, neuter and declaw it for good measure. Utterly sad, senseless, and kind of infuriating. I’m fairly sure the folks who participate in the Folsom Street Fair are happy to be active participants of what society deems the margins and aren’t dreaming of that spot on the PTA or the white picket fence house in the suburbs. Perhaps they do belong to those two groups, but their love of kink isn’t something they’re going to try to mold like a square peg into a round hole.
On with the book. There might be a few spoilerish comments, although there is no mystery or conflict to spoil. Sorry.
There isn’t much more to tell, but fairytale fantasies. Before telling Lars about this new obsession, Jonah writes to an online advice columnist voicing his fears of Lars’ reaction and HE USES Lars real name! Umm … wow. In the end Lars finds out and …. *crickets*. Nothing happens. Acceptance without a single doubt. Sure. Granted Lars had always been somewhat dominant, but I’d think jumping to wanting a puppy sub would merit a teensy bit of self reflection. But that’s just me. These two go full swing into the lifestyle, taking classes, because they’re just super dot the i’s cross the t’s kind of guys, and go off into the sunset in bliss.
There’s a dangle for the next book but I’m not sure I’ll go along for the ride. This was like reading the diary of your most boring cousin. You still love them but you don’t need to know about that day they reorganized their sock drawer. Also I didn’t care for this sort of present tense continuous? thing the author had going. *shrug* On the plus side this is one more book to add to my growing Vanilla Kink shelf. I’m not sure that’s a good thing.
This didn’t work for me, and I’m probably in the minority, but it might for someone who wants zero angst, conflict, and a super cautious, and perhaps inaccurate, peek into kink. It has likable characters, it’s well formatted, and has a cute cover.
A copy was provided in exchange for an honest review.
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