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Audiobook Review: This is Not a Horror Movie by Sara Dobie Bauer

Emory Jones loves two things: horror movies and Connor Nichols.

For the past four years, Emory, Connor, and their families have vacationed side by side on Longboat Key, Florida. Eighteen-year-old Emory has pined for his neighbor from behind the covers of Stephen King books, but college boy Connor has never noticed him. Probably because Emory looks like Jack Skellington with good hair.

Emory anticipates another predictable summer of sunburn and disappointment. Instead, he ends up with a mystery on his hands when a beloved beach bum goes missing, and Connor volunteers to help with the search. Turns out it’s not just scary movie cops who are worthless, so the boys start an investigation of their own—leading them straight to an abandoned beach resort.

Despite the danger, Emory and Connor grow closer, but as Emory’s gay dreams start coming true, so do the horror movie tropes he so loves. Even though he knows that sex equals death in slasher flicks, Emory can’t keep his hands off the guy of his teenage dreams.

This is Not a Horror Movie is a 78,000-word new adult gay rom-com… with a monster.



Reviewer: Annery

This is a lesson in trusting your friends, who seemingly know you better than you know yourself, and taking a chance on authors who’ve been good to you. Neither horror nor NA are preferred genres for me and yet … I was a happy camper.

I took this on as an audio review and on that front I couldn’t be happier. Blake Lockheart, a NTM narrator, did a fantastic job creating characters with his voice and breathing life into a SCREAM style story. Sampling the audio and a friendly nudge, where what got me to read/listen to this. I’m not mad. His voice pleasantly reminded me of Jason Clarke, could it be him branded for M/M narrations?

THE STORY:

For four (4) years Emory Jones and his family have been coming from Ohio for a yearly two week vacation at the seaside resort town of Longboat Key, Florida. Their neighbors during these summer idylls have always been the Nichols family, a blessing and a curse for young Emory as he’s harbored a secret (maybe not so secret) crush on Connor, the Nichols’ only son.

Connor is twenty (20), a former HS football star, current college student, and all around nice guy. He’s always treated Emory like a beloved pet or an amusing younger brother, this year things are different, Emory is different. He’s turned 18, finished HS, gotten into NYU, and shot up to six feet, something that irks his fraternal twin Liz to no end. To add insult to injury, and at Liz’s suggestion, he’s grown out his hair and is now officially hot. Connor notices. Big time.

At first there’s some bumbling about because neither knows about the other’s attraction. Emory in particular, who’s still growing into his ‘new’ body, and was bullied in HS, can’t see himself as appealing to someone like Connor, the almost hyper masc jock, and much less fathom that Connor isn’t straight. He’s not. While navigating this new relationship Connor & Emory become embroiled or rather are the only ones interested in the disappearance of a local homeless man. It would seem that some super natural occurrences at a local abandoned resort are germane to the case which falls into Emory’s, and to a lesser extent Connor’s, wheelhouse. They’re both fans of scary movies and Emory, an aspiring writer, is never without one or two horror classics by his side.

THOUGHTS:

I’ve read four books by Sara Dobie Bauer. Loved two of them, BIG TIME, one was okay, and the other was a pretty decisive no. I came up with an unscientific thesis that her Ohio set books or characters were catnip for me and that the others were not. TINAHM happily marries both aspects: Emory is from Ohio, Connor is from upstate New York, and the story takes place in Florida. Win.

Another aspect of SDB stories, which she holds true to here, is the characters, their physicality. Connor is big, strong, and protective, but also sensitive and caring. Emory is thin, tall, almost gangly looking, impossibly beautiful, and seemingly frail but with an unbreakable hidden inner strength. It works for me.

I’m happy to say that the supernatural or horror aspect is kind of light and doesn’t really come into play until the latter part of the story. The bulk of it deals with Connor & Emory navigating this budding romance, which I’m happy to say has very little to no angst, no undue histrionics, and no villains opposed to the couple on the basis of their sexuality. In standard NA style there’s some heavy petting but sex is off page, which is fine. I didn’t miss or need it. The relationship is sweet and snarky and completely adorable but only covers the two weeks of vacation. I’d be curious to see them some years down the road, hoping they’ve made it and matured and grown together.

As a plus the author surrounds the MC with a nice supporting cast not least of which are both sets of parents which made me happy. There are good, great parents out there and it’s nice to see them celebrated.

My ignorable niggle is one I have with most NA or just MM in general (which is what I tend to read). The MC tend to have frames of cultural reference which IMO don’t seem to match them, their age. Golden Girls, X-File, Lady and the Tramp etc are all things that roll off the tongue quite easily for Emory & Connor. I know they’re film buffs and perhaps pop culture enthusiasts but I just spent a week with my 20+ y.o. niece & nephew and 80’s & 90’s references required some explanation. They weren’t averse to learning, just didn’t know them. Maybe they’re outliers?

In any case enjoy a sweet, funny, and well developed story delivered in fantastic AB form. You’re welcome.




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