K.A. Merikan will be August's Author of the Month, so keep an eye out for more reviews of their work and an interview with them later this month!
Editor's Note: Things got a little...wacky with the use of some creative screennames. >__> Comments from the name in the beige color using "Ann" are actually made by Natasha. Comments from the name in the red color using "Natasha" are actually made by Ann. Let's just say Ann actually HATES clowns and LOVES the LA Kings, and Natasha HATES butterflies. Sometimes unis can get a little feisty.
Warning: This chat contains spoilers.
ANN! changed name to Natasha
LOVES butterflies
Natasha LOVES butterflies: DONE!
Audrey:
hahahahhahahahahahahaha
Breann: LOLOL
Ann Loves Clowns:
.............
Cupcake: nice!
Audrey: I'm
laughing so hard right now.
Sunny: lmao!!!
Ann Loves Clowns: You
know what? My name is Ann and I have a sour attitude toward Natasha, who is a
perfect angel
Natasha LOVES butterflies:
Your halo is crooked there Natasha
Justin: Can we
talk about masturbating now?
Breann: yes,
please
Breann: go
ahead, J
SRAL: onanists!
Lorix: Lol - the
book was funny! And SHORT
Jenni Lea: So, um... I have a confession to
make.
Natasha LOVES butterflies:
Go JL
SRAL: You didn't read it?
Lorix: JL!!
Justin: You didn't read the book?
Jenni Lea: I didn't read the book. I was too busy
watching Sons Of Anarchy
Jenni Lea: :(
Justin: You are punished
SRAL: These name changes are messing
with me.
Sunny: but...but...you missed lines like
"Benjamin was on a road to hell, paved with wasted semen."
Audrey
Okay,
quick copy/paste of the blurb for "An Onanist's Journey to Reclaiming His
Seed" so we know what's going on: Benjamin Snowley is trapped in a most
distressing predicament. He’d been feeling poorly and after having recently
recovered from influenza, with his eyesight worsening, he knows that the fault
for his declining health lays in a vice he wouldn’t dare mention in polite conversation.
Onanism, self-pollution,
masturbation. All names for the same sinful affliction.
Benjamin refuses to be dragged down
into an early grave by unnatural urges. When he finds out about a doctor who
came up with a new, experimental method of treating his illness, he jumps at
the opportunity.
Benjamin
Snowley is determined to get better even if the treatment is highly unorthodox
and involves an inappropriate proposition for a young stableman.
Natasha LOVES butterflies:
Oh JL, you would like this one too. You could probably finish it before we're
done chatting
Want to read more about this crazy little Regency story? Find out what we had to say about it after the jump!
Thanks for joining us! Come have a crumpet and cucumber sandwich while we use very proper British accents (of course!) to discuss our August Happy Hour Chat book!
Lorix:
Okay....first off can I declare my love for the perviness of the Doc
Sunny: I loved
your comment, Lori, about the Doc needing to observe the therapy :)
SRAL: Jizz
SRAL: Jizz
SRAL: Sperm
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I loved
Tom!!!!
Sunny: I loved
Tom, too!
Breann: OMG! Yes!
Breann: OMG! Yes!
Breann: I love
how technical everything was.
Breann: Like, I
need to stick my fingers in your ass. For science.
Ann Loves Clowns: this is
how science works, breann
Ann Loves Clowns: i asked
sara
SRAL: Semen!
Lorix: Well -
ya know, if you're gonna be a pervert you may as well do it properly
Audrey: The doc
totally skeeved me out.
Audrey: But Tom
was a sweetheart!
Justin: Do you
think Tom knew better?
Sunny: Oh,
yeah, he did
SRAL: I do!
Breann: yes,
definitely
Ann Loves Clowns: I like
to believe that Tom was an innocent idiot
Audrey: Me too,
Natasha. Like Al in "Muscling Through."
Sunny: No, Tom
knew, but he had a little of that servant/master thing going, too
Jenni Lea: *runs
off to read book real quick*
Natasha LOVES butterflies: But he
was such a flattered innocent idiot
Lorix: I liked
Tom - Benjamin was a major drip though!
Breann: Tom
knew exactly what he was doing. Oh, you need to drink my semen for health and
science? I guess I can oblige
Sunny:
exactly, Breann :D
Justin: If he
did, he's a scoundrel. I like scoundrels!
Ann Loves Clowns: LOL a
major DRIP? :D
Ann Loves Clowns: i love
you lori
Audrey: Well,
he knew that much, but...like he had sweet intentions! I think he liked
Benjamin.
Breann: Drip?
LOL
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Tom was
a little slow, but the smart kind that doesn't overanalyze the reason for the
dick sucking - SMART!
Audrey: No
overanalyzing the reasons for dick sucking.
Jenni Lea changed name to Jenni Lea
Needs to be Punished
Lorix: JL -
LOL
Natasha LOVES butterflies: LOL JL
Ann Loves Clowns changed name to Ann
HATES the LA Kings
Breann: OOOHHHH
SHIIIIIIIIIIIIT
Justin: oh
fuck!
Cupcake: *gasp*
too far!!!!!
Jenni Lea Needs to be
Punished: Oh, I think you may have gone too far
Natasha LOVES butterflies: OK -
now THAT is just fucked up and wrong right there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunny: uh oh
Breann: i can
NOT stop laughing
Natasha LOVES butterflies: *gets
on plane to Canada*
Cupcake: DEFCON
4
Audrey:
ooooooh, burn
Natasha LOVES butterflies: The
universe knows how ridiculous your statement is and chooses to ignore you
Ann HATES the LA Kings: bring
it on, annnnn :D
Lorix: A step
toooooo far my lovely Canadian
Audrey: Yes,
here's the line. You went over it!
Ann HATES the LA Kings:
*prances around*
Ann HATES the LA Kings: im a
rebel!
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Some
shit is sacred here.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: *puts
barstool in front of the prancing Natasha*
Ann HATES the LA Kings: HEY NOW
Ann HATES the LA Kings: one
time! it was one time!
Natasha LOVES butterflies: That's
ALL it takes
Sunny: We may
need to call a time out here
Justin: Why
can't we all just get along?
Justin: And
talk about dripping peens?
Audrey: YES,
LET'S! Dripping peens and blowjobs...
Audrey: FOR
SCIENCE
Ann HATES the LA Kings: i want
to believe they were both stupid... tom and benji :)
Lorix: Oh no -
Tom totes knew what he was doing. He was getting blow jobs and a chance to
stick his knob in his master's arse. Go Tom
Justin: BOOK
PEOPLE! WE ARE HERE TO TALK ABOUT A BOOK!
Cupcake: the
stallion has spoken
Lorix: When
the Stallion speaks we listen
Lorix:
......................................sometimes. Mwah J
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Get her
J!
Sunny: BACK TO THE BOOK! *cracks whip*
Audrey: Okay, what's everyone's favorite part of the book?
Sunny: BACK TO THE BOOK! *cracks whip*
Audrey: Okay, what's everyone's favorite part of the book?
Lorix: Tom
Lorix: Tom, I
liked Tom
Sunny: Tom...*sigh* with "…buttocks, round and hard like shelled nuts"
Sunny: Tom...*sigh* with "…buttocks, round and hard like shelled nuts"
Breann: I liked
Tom but I think my favorite was when he saw the doctor
Breann:
Everything was so matter of fact
Sunny: “I will
now enter you, so brace yourself.”
Lorix: Tom,
getting to shag because his boss was a big ol' drip
Audrey: For me,
I liked how there was this dichotomy while reading of thinking "this is so
fucked up" and "awwww, that's so sweet" at the same time. It was
a unique experience.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: YES
Audrey!
Ann HATES the LA Kings: I agree
with audrey.. it's like when you make the grossed out face but keep reading and
wiggling around
Lorix: Find
dictionary. Looks up dichotomy.
Lorix: Laughs
cos it sounds like diCKotomy
Cupcake: i liked
that he was going to go blind or get consumption if he didn't find a way to
stop
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Tom was
so sweet even though he was kinda lost
Ann HATES the LA Kings: I liked
Tom, but I loved Benji most. Bless his dumb little brain
Sunny: The
doctor was so pervy
Sunny:
"So the doctor would not only see but touch as well? Whatever it
took."
Breann:
"If you would bend over with your behind turned towards me."
Audrey: Now, he
wasn't a real doctor, right? He was a charlatan or whatever they were called in
the Regency period.
Natasha LOVES butterflies:
"It does not seem deviant, but we shall see how it feels to the
touch" - Pervy Doc
Sunny: I think
so, Audrey, or just a real pervy DR
Cupcake: and
why'd it have to be a working class man to cure him?
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Because
he's so strong and virile by nature
Audrey: Because
their seed is virile and gives them strength! :)
Breann: I see the
doctor looking over his small round spectacles
Breann: with a
top hat
Lorix: The
Doc. Good line of work for a regency pervert.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: And
greasing up his pervy little fingers
Ann HATES the LA Kings: *makes
notes in case she ever travels back in time*
Cupcake: how did
the Dr find the willing participants?
Lorix: It was
so freaking funny. The whole thing
Justin: I'm
glad Ben didn't fuck the nasty prostitute
Audrey: Me too,
J! I like how that was handled, actually. Benjamin seemed so sweet.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I like
how Benji wanted to have a statue carved of Tom and fantasized about him in a
uniform
Breann: His
proposition of Tom was funny too
Sunny: He was
a prime example of a working class male if Benjamin ever saw one…
Cupcake: indeed.
tom slept in hay. nothing says working class like sleeping in hay
Breann: “Oh,
it’s very simple really, unless you find me repulsive, but I am a very clean
man. I would need to ingest it, suck it out of your organ. It would be of no
harm to you, the doctor told me a man like you wouldn’t run out of it.”
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Nothing
says sexy like smelling like horseflesh
Lorix: Maybe,
once Benjamin was feeling strengthened by Tom's 'seed' he went back, got the dock
worker and they had a threesome. So restorative, for wankers
Ann HATES the LA Kings: mmm
horseflesh
Justin: Also
glad he invited Tom to his room. That was sweet.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: And
then they cuddled
Sunny: “I am
not asking for your sperm in charity, Tom. I will reimburse you for your loss.”
Breann: LOL
Sunny!
Breann: It's so
weird...
Sunny: Natasha
LOVES cuddling, too :)
Ann HATES the LA Kings:
cuddling is dumb. it wasted time when they couldve been bumsexing
Breann:
*cuddles next to natasha*
Breann: *gives
butterfly kisses*
Ann HATES the LA Kings: *drops
dead*
Jenni Lea Needs to be
Punished: LOL B
Natasha LOVES butterflies: LOL
Breann - you're my hero!
Audrey: My
favorite part: When Tom asks Benjamin, "Have you already healed yourself
this way?" And he clearly wants to know if he's gonna be Benjamin's first.
Audrey: <3
Sunny: Tom so
knew what was going on.
Lorix: Yes
Audrey, I liked that too...so do we think Tom was experienced in this, er,
'line of work'?
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Oh -
you are so right Audrey! That was cute. Tom was actually pretty sly a couple of
times
Breann: he
definitely did, Sunny
Cupcake: u think
it was tom's first time too?
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Tom was
with chicks before, but I think Benji was his first dude
Breann: You
think? It seemed like he knew what he was doing
Ann HATES the LA Kings: what a
stud
Justin: No I
think Tom was just in the right place at the right time.
Audrey: I think
Tom liked to have a good ol' romp in the hay, but he wasn't necessarily a
playboy or whatever.
Lorix: He was
a stud muffin
Ann HATES the LA Kings: yup,
total muffin of the stud variety
Natasha LOVES butterflies: He
appreciated an opportunity. Smart Tom is smart
Breann: the
last line made me laugh
Breann: “…he
was happy to vouch that the result were already most promising.”
Justin: love
that too, B
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Benji
was such the optimist
Lorix: Yeah,
that was good.
Audrey: That
was so sweet.
Cupcake: *snort*
Sunny: “I
thinks it’s already seeping into my glands,” he said, looking up at the finest
male specimen he’d ever seen. His whole body was on fire, surely already
ingesting the seed.
Breann: and so
clueless
Lorix: The
whole thing made me laugh.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: It was
really chucklicious
Sunny: It was
so utterly ridiculous. I loved it.
Breann: it was
all absurd and ridiculous and highly entertaining
Cupcake: i don't
think benji's very bright though
Sunny: No, he
definitely wasn't
Breann: he was
just... clueless.
Breann: and
pretty cute, too
Lorix: Benji
was defintely a sandwich short of a picnic
Justin: I
really enjoyed the whole story. I just wish it was longer!
Justin: Wanted
more sexy times.
Breann: of
course, i would have liked a good HEA
Sunny: Yes,
more sexy times would have been good.
Audrey: More
sexy times!
Audrey: This
may sound ridiculously practical, but I couldn't help but wonder where the doc
had gotten someone to create the "egg holder" a.k.a. butt plug.
Ann HATES the LA Kings: maybe
he was also a wizard
Sunny: I think
they had ALL kinds of toys back then. The egg holder was nothing new :)
Cupcake: did i
misread a line or did it sound like he thought he could get pregnant by this…
science?
Sunny: No,
Cupcake, he thought the sperm would pass through him to his wife!
Audrey: I
wanted a bit more of an HEA to show how they worked out their remedy long-term.
Justin: YES,
Audrey
Lorix: me
too!!
Cupcake: i'd
read another story if the Dr was the MC. for realz
Ann HATES the LA Kings: yes,
doctor kink is hawt @ cuppy
SRAL: I would
like a story with the doctor as a MC
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I want
more Tom and Benji
Lorix: He
needs a dungeon somewhere - and to watch. he's a watcher...
Cupcake: after
he was made more virile by the working class sperm
Breann: Yes! I
would definitely read about the doc!
SRAL: I'm
kinda over Benji and Tom...like I think it was the perfect length or I would
have gotten bored
Natasha LOVES butterflies: It
kinda had to end where it ended unless it wanted to be a full novella length
Sunny: A short
story where the doctor watches another patient in therapy
Breann: i would
read about the doc doing dr stuff to his patients
Breann: he's
such a scientific man
Sunny: me,
too, B
SRAL: i was
kinda hoping the doctor would have bumsexed Benji
Sunny: he
could make observations during the treatment, lol...
SRAL: A
little disappointed all he did was finger him
SRAL: Like
stick in the tip...for science
Audrey: Doctor
was a Creepy McCreeperson!!
Ann HATES the LA Kings: LOL. SRAL..
you're best
Cupcake: i bet
that Dr could really get down, get down
Lorix: It was
just that Dr and Benji so freaking clueless. He really was a drip - I mean, no
characteristics that usually makes a good MC, yet it worked.
Audrey: Awww,
really, Lori? I thought Benji was quite earnest, which was endearing to me.
Ann HATES the LA Kings: awwww,
I loved benji! i loved how clueless he was
Audrey: Earnest
and sweet.
Cupcake: ME TOO,
BABY!!!
Lorix: Nope,
he just didn't have anything I would normally look for.
Lorix: A bit
too naive. I don't know, normally I like sweet, naive, earnest.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I'll
stick with Tom, thanks
Breann: ..but i
liked him...
Audrey: Ditto.
Audrey: <3
Tom
Sunny: Benji
was earnest, and sweet. Just a little too gullible, though
SRAL: dick
gobbling doctor...now that's a calling card
Lorix: I liked
Tom
Sunny: I loved
Tom.
Breann: I'm
kind of all about the doctor
Sunny:
lol...I'm not surprised, B
Lorix: The Dr
was evil really. Poor little Benji, all he wanted to do was toss off.
Ann HATES the LA Kings: yeah, i
was cool with the doctor. added juuusttttttt enough weirdness
Sunny: I don't
think the Dr was evil, just a pervert
Lorix: A
pervert praying on the innocent wankers of...wherever the heck it was set
SRAL: I liked
Tom a little more than Mr. Snowley. Tom knew what time it was...mangina pumping
time
Cupcake:
oooooooo how ab/the Dr, Tom & Benji? WIN!
Justin: I think
it's been well established we all liked Tom. LMAO
Breann: I was
thinking the same thing, J! LOL
Ann HATES the LA Kings: i think
tom was only okay ;)
Jenni Lea Needs to be
Punished: OMG I can't stop laughing! *reads some more*
Audrey: Tom was
a farm boy in my head. Somehow, he had a Farmer Ted accent.
Lorix: He was
totally a farm boy
Sunny: and he
had the forearms to prove it...Benjamin’s gaze strayed to the thick veins on
Tom’s forearms and he almost came in his pantaloons from the sight alone.
Justin:
Pantaloons FTW!!
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I liked
that Sunny - Benji was SO into the dudes and just hadn't figured it out yet
Audrey: Tom was
TOTALLY COLBY KELLER.
Audrey: !!!
SRAL:
COLBY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Breann: COLBY
FTW!
Lorix: OMG -
HE was.
Lorix: I can
see that now.
SRAL: LMAO
Natasha LOVES butterflies:
*rereads while picturing Colby as Tom*
Cupcake: Colby…
*sigh*
Audrey: Only
slightly-scruffy Colby, though.
Sunny: He
reminded me of Vorgell
Audrey: Me too,
Sunny!
Breann: Yes! He
kind of did... you'
Breann: re
rigyt
Breann: i can't
type...
Sunny: Sweet,
horny
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Awww
Tom/Vorgell
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Tom had
smoother moves though
Sunny: Yes, he
did
Audrey: I liked
when he said he had duties to attend to, but it's okay - I'm young. :D
Audrey: Why do
you guys think Benji was falling ill, anyway?
Natasha LOVES butterflies: He did
say he was getting over the flu
Lorix: Because
he was a tosser
Cupcake: i think
it was psychosomatic
Breann: because
he ran out of sperm!
Justin: I think
it was in his head
Sunny: psychosomatic maybe?
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I think
he just stayed inside too much becuase he was too busy jerkin' it
Breann: i think
it was in his head, too
Cupcake: since
he healed after his first "treatment"
Audrey:
Psychosomatic! I wouldn't even have remembered that word - we sound all
professional, guys. ;)
Ann HATES the LA Kings: okay,
did we already do favorite quotes? if not... ratings? :D (audrey will be so
proud of me)
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Who are
you and what have you done with Natasha?
Audrey: (so
proud of you, Natasha! *handshakes firmly*)
Sunny: Okay, I
think it WAS Tom's first time...“Do you want me to just push in?” rasped Tom.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Ditto
Sunny's quote and all the other quotes
Audrey: I think
we sprinkled some quotes earlier, but if there are any more, let's hear 'em!
Justin: B had
all my quotes
Breann: I had
them ready to copy & paste!
Sunny: "It was
good that Tom wanted his comfort despite how depraved Benjamin was."
Breann: I was
ready TWO months in a row.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Good
job mama B!
Ann HATES the LA Kings: breann
is on da baallll :D
SRAL: Oh man
I suck. I have no fave quotes
Sunny: I have
pages of quotes. I loved this story!
Breann: I could
have done with more perv from the doc
Audrey: I loved
this one: "It's not the best of quality, but with your help it might
become prime porcelain," Benjamin said, never taking his hand off that
tense stomach. Tom blinked and shook his head. "You are prime porcelain
already. Compared to you, I'm a brick."
Cupcake: i liked
that line too, audrey
Sunny: Did I
already do this one? “Anything in the pursuit of health, doctor.”
SRAL: Oh that
was a good line
Lorix: That
was a good line. I think you guys have already added all the best quotes.
Audrey: I loved
how gentle Tom was. Gentle yet confident.
Audrey: Yet
deferring to his master.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: He
totally dug on Benji, and not just his booty
Cupcake: like
colby
Justin: Tom
just wanted to ram it in
Sunny: lol,
Justin
Ann HATES the LA Kings: he
loved him for his brain
Natasha LOVES butterflies: Yes,
that was it, his brain
Audrey: The doc
part was just a little too squicky for me, though.
SRAL: I
wished Dr. Tissot somehow made it a fuck sandwich.
Cupcake:
"Tom was like a stallion ready to mount the mare." *nods*
Lorix: I
totally do think the doc should have insisted on watching.
Natasha LOVES butterflies: I hope
Benji moves to the country
Sunny: Tom WAS
like a stallion :)
Sunny: In the
next story, Lori
Lorix: See? - He
likes to watch
Lorix: I knew itThanks for joining us for August's Happy Hour Chat. We hope you enjoyed the chat about this cute and crazy little story. Fare thee well, ladies and guv'nors! *curtsies and a tipped hat from the Stallion*
Editor's Note: This chat has been edited for length and clarity.
I've read this two times now and totally confused! Enjoyable but confusing....
ReplyDeleteUm...yep...that's us!
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