Group Review: How to Bottom Like a Porn Star by Woody Miller

How Do Gay Porn Stars Make Bottoming Look So Easy?
Hung tops stick it in like a glute inject and the bottoms don’t even flinch. What’s their secret? And what can you learn from them so you can have ecstatic butt sex without any pain? Some of the answers will shock you.

Learn porn star secrets to bottoming without pain and start making love with volcanic pleasure. Written by gay sex advice columnist Woody Miller and a team of urologists and colon-rectal specialists, this book combines porn industry secrets with innovative techniques from the latest gay male sex research.

How We Got The Porn Industry’s Secrets To Bottoming Without Pain.
We sent a team of researchers to interview a truckload of gay male erotica industry folk—cameramen, scouts, producers, directors and performers. The result is a fascinating, behind-the-scenes, no-holds-barred look into the industry and the secrets they use to get performers to bottom without pain or messy scenes. The main sections:

1: What You Can Learn From Porn Star Bottoms.
A fascinating view of bottoming in the porn industry—how gay erotica performers prepare for a shoot, how they can take huge tops without any pain (even if it’s their first time) and how they stay loose despite day-long shoots. If you ever had a question about how the porn industry works, this is the place to find answers—from how much money porn stars make to what percent are heterosexual (shocking!) to their favorite brand of douches.

2: Free Your Mind, Your Butt Will Follow.
How To Bottom Like A Porn Star: The Ultimate Guide To Gay Sex is part porn exposé, part how-to from the latest gay sex research. In this chapter, we’ll look at how “Anticipatory pain” and a perceived loss of masculinity can put your butt in a headlock. We’ll show you how to resolve the emotional blocks that stop you from trying or enjoying anal sex with other gay men.

3: Why It Feels Like You’re Being Impaled By A Fence Post.
From our urologist and colon-rectal experts who specialize in gay male sex: It isn’t just your sphincter causing all that pain; it’s your “S-curve” as well as involuntary puborectal contractions. Learn your anatomical structure so you can make the tips in this book work better.

4: How Porn Star Bottoms Relax Their Sphincters.
Not all do it, or need to, but the gay men in the sex industry that do swear by it. Find out whether you should use their controversial method.

5: The Porn Star Method Of Eliminating Pain.
Find out the shocking things gay male erotica stars do to eliminate pain. Some cannot be recommended, but others can and we’ve combined them with a technique that blends systematic desensitization, pattern breathing, progressive muscle relaxation and sexual imagery to completely eliminate pain and heighten pleasure.

6: How Porn Star Bottoms Handle The Ick Factor.
Find out their secrets to getting your butt cleaner than a Brady Bunch rerun.

7: A Device That’s Better Than A Douche Or An Enema.
Enemas and douches are a bad idea (despite the porn industry’s reliance on them). Find out why and what product doctors recommend that will get you as clean as a douche without any of the harmful side effects.

8: How To Bottom Without Pain For The First Time.
Here you’ll learn how to combine the best position with the best angle of entry.

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There was great excitement in the clubhouse when we heard there was a book called 'How to Bottom Like a Porn Star' coming out - I mean us unicorns are all about the learning. So a buddy read was decided upon, a discussion thread was made and all aspects of the book were discussed and scrutinised. Then we wrote our reviews and here, for your perusal, is what Breann, Justin, Sunny and me, Lorix, think about bottoming like porn stars.

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First up, Mistress Breann;

As a M/F romance reader turned M/M romance reader, I was kind of shocked to see how often sex in gay romance is criticized for being unrealistic. Het sex in het romance isn't realistic, but it's not mentioned nearly as much by readers and reviewers. With HTBLAPS I was hoping to get a dose of 'reality' when it comes to the sex I read about the most.

If this is the reality, I don't want to read about it. Please stick to the 1-2-3-and-GO! method we all know and love. With added blow job and rimming, of course. Please & thank you.

The process for completely pain free bottoming is a very involved one. One that would take weeks before they are ready for the penis. I'm sure it works, the advice seems sound, so the guide would be more for someone who really, really wants to bottom with their partner but is absolutely terrified. I can see the use, but I don't think it's for everybody.

Okay, okay, I guess I also read this to know learn about the porn. There were some interesting tidbits (some that made me a little sad) and this was my favorite part of the book. I guess I need to find a book that only talks about porn star secrets.

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Now here's the view of the Stallion in the clubhouse, Justin;

I'm not sure who the target audience is for How To Bottom Like A Porn Star but from the title I'd say it was targeting the middle aged gay man, who's having a midlife crisis and is planning to scratch "being Gang Banged" off his bucket list.

Once you start reading, it's as though it's written for the 16 year old virgin who thinks he may be gay. There's a lot of what I call "therapy speak" in the beginning and, mixed with the attempts at humor, it drove me nuts. The other advice was either common sense or over the top, IMHO.

If you want to save your time and $10, here's my answer to HTBLAPS:

Common Sense Bottoming for the Gay Man by Justin J.

*It's not that painful. Suck it up. Don't be a wuss!
*Bottoming does NOT make you a girl, chopping off your dick and balls DOES!
*Don't chop off your dick and balls.
*Use a condom unless you're in a long term, committed relationship.
*Use lots of lube. NOT soap, hand cream, etc.
*Unless you like 'the burn', start with one finger and work your way up to 3 stretching your bum hole.
*Always have 'listening to the radio' in mind when bottoming. (*listening to the radio is Unicorn code for anal leakage)
*Try a little snogging, it goes a long way in helping you relax.
*Have your pitcher slowly ease in and pause until you're ready for him to start moving.
*When you're ready, give him the 'all clear'.
*Enjoy the ride!

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Now for our ray of sunshine, Sunny;

It's important to keep in mind this book is for people who would like to bottom, but, for various reasons, are scared to try it. The author addresses some of those reasons to reassure the reader that all will be okay. While I found some of the facts and tips quite interesting, I also thought the process sounded like a lot of work. Of course, after all that work, "It's time for a penis", so that was good.

Some of the facts and tips focused on anatomy and how the body works, others focused on the types of foods that are better for more efficient "waste elimination" to reduce the "ick factor".

I also appreciated the section about getting past stereotypes and doing away with labels, although I wondered how many people really believe those stereotypes, especially to the point of it affecting their ability to bottom during sex.

Getting past the pain was the main part that seemed like a lot of work. If it helps someone enjoy bottoming, though, more power to them. I think I would have given up if it took that long to prepare for the big event.

My favorite part of the book included interesting tidbits about the porn industry. I knew there was a lot of editing, but I had no idea how long a typical shoot was. It gave me a new respect for the actors if they can even kind of look like they are enjoying themselves after all that time. Also, they use how much lube?!

One thing I didn't like was how the author went off on the drugs in general tangent. The section with the letters really irritated me; the responses to his readers were incredibly rude and arrogant. Even if I agreed with some of his points, he did a horrible job of selling them. Bludgeoning people with his opinions and running over their counterarguments with so little respect was not the way to persuade anyone.

So, I learned some good stuff about anatomy, diet, and how porn is made, but I was a little disappointed at how most of the information was presented. How is this pertinent to M/M romance stories? Not in any way I'd want to read about. Leave me my fantasies, thank you very much.

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And what did I think?
 Lorix;

When the Unicorns started talking about this new book 'How to Bottom Like a Porn Star' I was curious and I wanted to read it. Pain free bottoming...it sounded both promising and interesting.

So here, in the clubhouse, we talked about looking at the book from three POV's - the MM reader's, the avid porn watcher's & personal experience.

Okay so I'll start with porn watching...
I wouldn't say I was an avid viewer, but I have watched the odd porno. Of course I have, it's the 21st century & I'm well over the age of consent. The insight into the world of making porn films was interesting - though, if I'm honest, nothing was a huge surprise. I didn't imagine that porn stars were magically falling in love with each other and were so unable to keep their hands off each other that they went for hours without some kind of help. Like any sort of film it's meant to portray a situation, not be real life. I did find the references to 'famous' or 'infamous' porn stars - that were never named - slightly irritating. Did it really matter how big (snigger), or not, they were if they weren't named. If they were actors in porn films then, however little or well known they were, their POV was valid.

So personal experience. Well aren't you just a bunch of voyeurs? I may or may not be using some of the tips in the future. I may or may not have come away with some useful information. I (a)may or may not (gonna) share this information.

And that leaves MM romance - an area of interest to me. Did it affect my views of the sexy times in my favourite romance novel? No, not really. When I'm reading I want to be carried away with the moment - sure I want it to be believable to a certain extent but, in the same way you never hear about stinky socks and farting, I don't need to hear about my butt virgins doing anal exercises for weeks before hand before getting down and dirty. Okay, that's perhaps a simplistic view, but I'm writing a review, not an essay.

So what did I think all in all? Honestly - there was some interesting information and advice. A lot of it is common sense though, personally I'd much rather read the Stallion's take on bottoming. It sounds much more reasonable and I agree with everything he said.

The humour in the book was just annoying, I didn't care so much for the author's letters to his readers, it was VERY repetitive at times and it could have been half the size.

In my opinion the porn star title is just trying to amass publicity (well done, it worked) and the actual, useful advice could have been condensed into a book quarter of the size.

Do I regret reading it? No.
Do I prefer the Stallion's tips? Yes.
Would I read it again? No.

...well except for the advice I highlighted, obviously....;)

So there you have it, that's what four unicorns think about Bottoming Like a Porn Star...but what do you think??

 

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