Review: Christmas with Danny Fit by Amy Lane

In a perfect moment of cold November sunshine, pudgy accountant Kit Allen realizes Jesse, his new office assistant, is everything he's ever dreamed about in a man. Feeling supremely unworthy and desperate to get a life—even an imaginary one—Kit embarks on a self-improvement campaign featuring DVD fitness guru, Danny Fit.

In the meantime, Jesse has begun a subtle campaign of his own, one designed to bring Kit out of his DVD dream world and into Jesse's arms. Jesse isn't perfect—he's no Danny Fit—but he hopes that the kind, funny man who has been looking at him so soulfully since his first day at work has what it takes to be everything Jesse has always wanted.

OH HOLY CUTENESS!

This was everything a holiday novella should be. Everything.

It gave me a sorts of good, squishy feels. The kind that put a big grin on mah face and makes me go, 'd'aaaaawwwwww!'

Kit thinks he doesn't have much going for him. He's never had a boyfriend, he lives with his mom and is a little overweight. Well, he's had it! That's it! He's moving out, getting in shape and getting a boyfriend. The boyfriend might be imaginary and with his hand, but hey, it's a start. Not only is he getting his life together but he has a new bestie, his super hot assistant, Jesse.

I loved how their friendship developed before any boyfriend stuff started. They hung out and learned about each other first and then they moved their relationship further. It made everything about their relationship feel real and genuine. But of course, I'm screaming at the kindle 'Just kiss already dammit! Kiiiiiiiiiiiiiiss!' But when it happened? *sigh* So cute. The complete shock and delight that Kit had when finding out that Jesse was not only gay, but interested in him was just too adorable.

"'What's 'Pat' short for?'

The quirk became a full-blown grin. 'Patrick.'

Kit's mouth made a soft little O, and Jesse's grin disappeared, and then their lips were touching, and it was... Oh God.."

I just couldn't believe how invested I was in these characters in under 100 pages. Hell, how much I loved them in under 20 pages. Kit was just too loveable and I was rooting for him from the first page. Then we were introduced to Jesse and I was done for. It totally sucked me in and would not let me go until the last word.

Bottom line: Amy Lane writes a good book. Whether it's angst, cute & sweet, long, short, sad, happy... it doesn't matter. Ms. Lane writes it, I'm most likely gonna love it and then somewhere in my review I'm going to gush about my undying, never ending love for Amy Lane. Kinda like I did just now.

Blog Tour: Let It Snow by Heidi Cullinan (With Excerpt!)

Today, Boy Meets Boy Reviews has the scoop on Heidi Cullinan's latest story, Let It Snow.  Read up on this lovely holiday story below and check out the excerpt!

*****

Summary:

The weather outside is frightful, but this Minnesota northwoods cabin is getting pretty hot.

Stylist Frankie Blackburn never meant to get lost in Logan, Minnesota, but his malfunctioning GPS felt otherwise, and a record-breaking snowfall ensures he won’t be heading back to Minneapolis anytime soon. Being rescued by three sexy lumberjacks is fine as a fantasy, but in reality the biggest of the bears is awfully cranky and seems ready to gobble Frankie right up.

Marcus Gardner wasn’t always a lumberjack—once a high-powered Minneapolis lawyer, he’s come home to Logan to lick his wounds, not play with a sassy city twink who might as well have stepped directly out of his past. But as the northwinds blow and guards come down, Frankie and Marcus find they have a lot more in common than they don’t. Could the man who won’t live in the country and the man who won’t go back to the city truly find a home together? Because the longer it snows, the deeper they fall in love, and all they want for Christmas is each other.

Warning: Contains power outages, excessive snowfall, and incredibly sexy bears.

*****

Sounds pretty awesome, right? 

To read more about bears, twinks, and holiday shenanigans, check out this excerpt from the story!

Excerpt from Let It Snow by Heidi Cullinan: 

Wind rocked the cabin, making the logs creak and sending hard pellets of snow against the windows. In the city when it snowed, snowy nights were almost as bright as day, the blanket of white reflecting the streetlights. Here there was no light at all, and the cabin was pitch-black save the soft glow of the fire Marcus had banked. Frankie thought of how dark it would have been had he been trapped in his car, and he shivered. His mind added a sidebar of how cold it was likely to be in there now, and Frankie shivered even harder.

The other side of the foldout bed shifted as Marcus turned over. “You okay?”

Feeling foolish, Frankie nodded. “Yes, sorry. Just thinking how cold and dark it is in my car and how lucky I am to have found somewhere to stay for the night.”

To Frankie this was a vulnerable, confessional moment, and he expected Marcus to soften under it, maybe giving him a gruff, “You’re safe now,” or something equally benign but ice thawing. Instead of softening, though, Marcus put his back to Frankie again, and when he spoke, he sounded irritated. “Be a lot longer than one night. This is a hell of a storm.”

Hurt and confused, Frankie turned away too. “I’ll find a way to get to a hotel tomorrow so I’m not a bother to you.”

“The closest hotel is in Eveleth. You won’t be getting there anytime soon.”

Frankie wished he were the kind of asshole who could decide to stay with Marcus as long as possible, annoying him as some kind of payback. He wasn’t. “I’ll find somewhere else in town then.”

“You’ll stay here. Now shut up and sleep, because I’m pretty sure tomorrow’s going to be interesting.”

Burrowing deeper into the covers, Frankie shut his eyes tight and swallowed hard, telling himself he wasn’t going to cry and give the big jerk on the other side of the bed the satisfaction of seeing how easily his barbs took hold. He vowed he’d talk with Arthur about his offer of sharing a bed with him and Paul—clearly that overture came with sex, but that didn’t seem like it’d be a hardship anymore, and anyway he’d fuck about anybody to get away from Marcus and his ability to swipe the rug out from under him every time he tried to stand.

Frankie was half-asleep, consoling himself with a soft-core porn fantasy of being caressed by a pair of gentle lumberjacks, when he was awoken by a loud, hard crack.

He sat bolt upright, turning to the window where he fully expected to see a tree cracked in two, but then a second sharp sound broke through the air, followed by a low, erotic moan. The sound, Frankie realized, came from upstairs.

Arthur’s voice drifted down, muffled by wind and floorboards, but there was no mistaking what he said. “That’s right, you hot little fucker. Lift that ass so I can smack it.”

As a cascade of blows and moans came from the loft, Frankie lowered himself carefully back to the bed and stared wide-eyed at the ceiling, all hope of sleep gone as he listened to the muted but graphic soundtrack to an amateur BDSM scene. Arthur rattled off a constant stream of dirty talk, commenting on the allure of Paul’s anus—look at that hot little hole—and the many variations of oral sex he planned to perform on it—want to cram my tongue in there and lick out your insides, you sexy bitch.

Soon the play-by-play stopped, and Frankie could only presume Arthur was putting his money where his mouth was, or at least giving the kind of rimming to Paul Frankie had only seen through the curtain of his fingers when his roommate had tried to get him to watch hardcore online porn. Paul’s cries were by turns agonized and aroused, sometimes begging Arthur to stop, sometimes pleading with him not to. Occasionally Arthur would growl something at Paul, making him whimper or say something angrily back, but mostly Paul moaned, especially when the telltale banging began, indicating Paul’s hot little hole was seeing a more significant form of activity. Hard, relentless activity that had Paul almost sobbing.

For his part, Frankie tried not to breathe, let alone move. His cock had come to full attention under the blanket, but he knew now he’d endure Marcus’s crankiness for the rest of his life before he’d make himself a third participant in the kind of sex going on in the loft. His roommate had taught him to respect rough sex, but their one mutual, tentative foray into the activity had made it clear Frankie was a BDSM observer only.

He’d never thought he’d be so up close and personal with it.

Especially with total strangers.

In a cabin in a snowstorm.

In a cabin in a snowstorm where he would apparently be stuck for days.

This time Frankie worked hard to control his shaking, truly not wanting to endure Marcus’s disdain on top of his shock, but as the activity upstairs wound to a climax and Frankie’s tremors became pronounced, the bed shifted and Marcus’s dark, bearded face loomed over Frankie’s.

“You okay?”

Frankie nodded quickly, willing Marcus to believe him, but Paul cried out as if he’d been gutted, and Frankie’s whole body spasmed in response.

To his surprise, Marcus’s countenance eased. “It’s all right. I know they play rough, but Paul’s tougher than you think. He tells Arthur no when he doesn’t want it, and Arthur listens.” Marcus grimaced, but for once the displeasure didn’t seem to be aimed at Frankie. “They’re a fucking awful couple, and they each keep trying to find other people, but they’ve been friends forever, and somehow fucking each other has always been a part of their relationship.” His face smoothed out again, and for a moment Marcus became the gentle lumberjack of Frankie’s fantasy. “They wouldn’t have played with you like that if you’d gone to bed with them, not if you didn’t want it, but they would have tried. You didn’t seem like the type for that, which was why I didn’t let them coerce you up there just yet. I figured you had enough on your plate tonight without their Sid and Nancy routine.”

“Thanks,” Frankie whispered, unable to say anything else.

With a curt nod, Marcus lay back down. Frankie remained awake for some time, though, well past the finale of the upstairs performance. Lying on the bed, surrounded by the warmth Marcus’s body gave off beneath their shared blanket, Frankie lay awake for a long time, swimming in a sea of overstimulation and confusion.

Want to read more?  Let It Snow is available now at Samhain, Amazon, and Barnes & Noble!

About the Author:

Heidi Cullinan has always loved a good love story, provided it has a happy ending. She enjoys writing across many genres but loves above all to write happy, romantic endings for LGBT characters because there just aren't enough of those stories out there. When Heidi isn't writing, she enjoys cooking, reading, knitting, listening to music, and watching television with her husband and ten-year-old daughter. Heidi also volunteers frequently for her state's LGBT rights group, One Iowa, and is proud to be from the first midwestern state to legalize same-sex marriage. Find out more about Heidi, including her social networks, at www.heidicullinan.com.

You can find Heidi on the web here:

Website:  http://www.heidicullinan.com/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/heidicullinan

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heidicullinan

Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3173295.Heidi_Cullinan

Happy Hour Chat: The Christmas Throwaway by RJ Scott

Last month we brought you a Happy Hour Chat filled with aliens and double penises to kick off Boy Meets Boy Reviews. This month we've got tinsel glinting from our unicorn horns, and we're mixing things up a little for the holidays! We're chatting about a holiday novella that ended up tugging quite a few heartstrings.  RJ Scott will be BMBR's featured author of the month, so keep an eye out for more reviews of works by RJ Scott as well as a Q&A with the author next week! We even got a head start earlier this week with this review of RJ's upcoming Crooked Tree Ranch.

December's Happy Hour Chat book is The Christmas Throwaway by RJ Scott.

Audrey: Okay, guys, no more talking about furries and Viking porn! Let's talk about.....The Christmas Throwaway! 

Natasha: okay... other talk later... after! 

Justin: Crack that whip Audrey 

Audrey: *cracks the whip* ;) What did we all think? 

Natasha: Oooohhh audrey the dominatrix! *wanders over near* 

ann: loved it! 

Breann: I really liked it, too. it tugged at my heartstrings. 

Jenni Lea: me too 

Lorix: Sames 

Audrey 

Quick copy/paste of the blurb!

Christmas is a time for giving - what do you do when no one gives a damn?

For Zachary Weston Christmas means sleeping on a churchyard bench in the freezing snow with nothing better in his future. Thrown out of his home for being gay, he is left without money or, it seems, anywhere to go.

Until a stranger shows him that some people do give a lot more than a damn.

Ben Hamilton is a rookie cop in his small home town. He finds a young throwaway, fresh from the city, sleeping on a bench in the churchyard on a snowy Christmas Eve. Can he be the one to give Zachary his own Christmas miracle?

Natasha: yes my heart was all aghast with emotion 

SRAL: meh 

ann: I want to make a hallmark channel division of the UM production company to make this into a movie 

Audrey: Ann, I'd be so on board with that. Flufftastic sweetness. *sighs a smoopy sigh*

Breann: It would be a perfect hallmark movie! 

Want to read more of our holiday chat, including why this story had some of us in tears, why we'd cast one of our unicorns as one of the characters, and whose dick we want to punch? Check it out after the jump!

Blog Tour: Kick Start by Josh Lanyon (with giveaway info!)

Today we're happy to be part of Josh Lanyon's blog tour for his new release, Kick Start. Check out the awesome recipes, read about the book, and then enter the giveaway with the raffle widget below!

Dinner with the In-Laws

When Will brings Taylor home to meet the family, Bill Brandt slays the fatted calf -- well, no. But he does cook a hot and heart-warming Welcome Home supper. Maybe a little too heart-warming for Taylor.  You might also want to keep the Tums handy.

Bill Brandt’s Sirloin Chili

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons olive oil

2 pounds sirloin steak - cut into 1 inch cubes

2 onions, chopped

3 cloves garlic, minced

1 green chili pepper

2 tablespoons chili powder

1 tablespoon ground cumin

1 1/2 teaspoons ground cayenne pepper

2 (29 ounce) cans diced tomatoes

1 (15 ounce) can kidney beans, drained

Directions:

Come in from busting bad guys' chops all week and start Sunday dinner for your two hungry adolescent sons.

• In a large pot over medium high heat, combine the oil and steak and saute for about 5 minutes, or until steak is browned. Add the onions, garlic and chili pepper and saute for another 5 minutes, or until the onions are translucent.
• Add the chili powder, cumin, cayenne pepper, tomatoes and kidney beans. Reduce heat to low, cover and simmer for about one hour. Remove cover and simmer for another 30 minutes, or until you've reached your desired thickness.

(Makes 6 to 7 servings)

Grandma Mills' Cornbread

Ingredients:

1 tablespoon vegetable shortening, for skillet

2 cups yellow cornmeal

1 1/2 cups flour

2 teaspoons salt 

2 teaspoons baking powder 

1 teaspoon baking soda 

3 eggs, beaten 

2 cups milk 

1/4 cup melted butter 

melted butter for brushing top

Directions:

• Preheat oven to 425°. Put oil or shortening in a 10-inch iron skillet and place in the oven to preheat while making batter. In a mixing bowl, combine cornmeal, flour, salt, baking powder, and soda.
• In another bowl, whisk together the eggs, milk, and butter. Combine with dry ingredients and stir until all ingredients are moistened. Batter will be like a thick pancake batter.
• Carefully, with heavy oven mitts, lift skillet out and turn to coat all of the inside surface with oil. Pour in batter and return to oven. Bake for about 20 to 25 minutes, until browned. A toothpick inserted in center should come out clean.

***Suggested beverage pairing: Corona or Tecate beer

Red Chili-Spiked Chocolate Mousse (From Will's mom's recipe book)

Ingredients:

1 teaspoon unflavored gelatin

4 tablespoons water, divided

2/3 cup unsweetened cocoa powder, preferably Dutch-process

1/4 cup granulated sugar

2 teaspoons mild-to-medium New Mexican red chili powder, plus more for garnish

1 teaspoon instant espresso powder

1/8 teaspoon salt

1 large egg

3/4 cup low-fat milk

2 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped

1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla extract

8 teaspoons dried egg whites (see Note), reconstituted according to package directions (equivalent to 4 egg whites)

1/2 cup packed light brown sugar

1/2 teaspoon cream of tartar

Directions:

• Sprinkle gelatin over 2 tablespoons water in a small bowl; set aside.
• Combine cocoa, granulated sugar, chili powder, espresso powder and salt in a large saucepan. Whisk in egg, then milk. Cook over medium-low heat, whisking constantly, until steaming and just beginning to thicken, 4 to 5 minutes. Remove from the heat and immediately whisk in the softened gelatin, chocolate and vanilla. Stir until the chocolate is melted and fully incorporated.
• Beat egg whites, brown sugar and cream of tartar in a medium bowl with an electric mixer on high-speed just until firm peaks form.
• Stir one-fourth of the egg whites into the chocolate mixture until smooth. Fold in the remaining egg whites until fully incorporated. Spoon the mousse into 8 dessert glasses or cups.
• Chill the mousse until set, at least 2 hours. Sprinkle with chili powder, if desired.

(Makes: 8 servings, about 1/2 cup each)

* * * * *

About the Book :

Series : Dangerous Ground, Book 5

Author : Josh Lanyon

Publisher : Just Joshin

Release Date : December 1 , 2013

Pages : 128 pages (e-book)

Blurb : Will is finally braced to bring Taylor home to meet the folks. Unfortunately, not every member of the Brandt clan loves Taylor the way Will does. Then again, not everyone loves the Brandts. In fact, someone has a score to settle -- and too bad for any former DS agents who get in the way when the bullets start to fly.

Purchase Links

Amazon I ARe I B&N I Smashwords

* * * * *

About the Author

A distinct voice in gay fiction, multi-award-winning author Josh Lanyon has been writing gay mystery and romance for over a decade. In addition to numerous short stories, novellas, and novels, Josh is the author of the critically acclaimed Adrien English series, including The Hell You Say, winner of the 2006 USABookNews awards for GLBT Fiction and a Lambda Literary Award finalist for Gay Mystery. Josh is also the author of the definitive M/M writing guide Man, Oh Man: Writing M/M Fiction for Kinks and Ca$h.

But, really...do you care? Probably not. More to the point, Josh writes gay or M/M romance -- usually within the context of a mystery / romantic-suspense or action - adventure. Lanyon's particular brand of erotic romance features sexy cops and smartass writers, tough Navy SEALs and sensitive artists, hard as nail special agents and...other hard as nails special agents. Josh is an EPPIE Award winner and a three-time Lambda Literary Award finalist. He lives in Los Angeles, California with his Significant Other. You can find out more at the Just Joshin blog on Livejournal/Blogspot or through Josh's mailing list.

You can also find Josh at :

* * * * *

There will be a total of NINE lucky winners, selected randomly across the entire BlogHop (Prize details listed below). For a chance to win one of these swagalicious giveaways all you need to do is follow the Rafflecopter link below, and fill in your details - BUT don't forget to comment here too. :)

Kick Start Giveaway Info :

• Begins Day 1 of Blog Hop, December 2, 2013
• Ends on Final Day of Blog Hop, December 7, 2013, at midnight EDT
• Drawings are open to both U.S. readers and international readers.
• PLEASE NOTE : Winners will be announced on Josh's Facebook Fan Page on Sunday December 8th, 2013 - there will be 9 winners in total (prizes as listed below)

Prizes :

• Grand Prize : Paperwhite Kindle with all "Dangerous Ground" books sent separately (including Kick Start) for winner to install.
• Kick Start T'shirt
• Kick Start Coffee Mug
• Set of Magnets
• 2 ebooks to 1 lucky winner from Josh's back catalogue
• 3 audiobooks to 3 lucky winners (1 each) from Josh's back catalogue
• Top Secret Special Edition Mug

Good luck! And thanks for stopping by!

Review: Junk (The Bristol Collection, #1) by Josephine Myles

Letting go is the first step to healing…or bringing it all crashing down.

When an avalanche of books cuts off access to his living room, university librarian Jasper Richardson can no longer ignore the truth. His ever-growing piles of books, magazines and newspapers can no longer be classified as a “collection”. It’s a hoard, and he needs professional help.

Professional clutter clearer and counselor Lewis Miller thinks he’s seen it all, but even he has to admit he’s shocked. Not so much by the state of Jasper’s house, but by the level of attraction he still feels for the sexy bookworm he remembers from school.

What a shame that Lewis’s ethical code forbids relationships with clients. As Jasper makes slow but steady progress, though, the magnetic pull between them is so strong even Lewis is having trouble convincing himself it’s a temporary emotional attachment arising from the therapeutic process.

Jasper longs to prove to Lewis that this is the real deal. But first he’ll have to lay bare the root of his hoarding problem…and reveal the dark secret hidden behind his walls of books.

Product Warnings
Contains a level-headed counselor with a secret addiction, a bespectacled geek with a sweet tooth, a killer “to-be-read” pile, embarrassing parents, a van called Alice, and deliciously British slang.

Fangirl moment. Books I love to love.

So I'm recycling an old review of mine today from fellow Brit, Josephine Myles. Unicorn Ann introduced me to this author, for which I will be ever thankful.

Okay, well I've literally sat down all day reading because I couldn't put this book down.

Jasper has a problem hoarding books (I'm feeling you Jasper, I really am) and Lewis is half of the clearing out company he hires to help him with his problem. Despite growing feelings between the two men, Lewis is trying not to let the relationship develop as he feels he is abusing his power as therapist to Jasper. He's worried that Jasper's feelings are really only a transference of the safety he feels with Lewis and that when his hoarding problem is sorted Jasper will no longer be needing him.

It is obvious from the start that these two men are supposed to be together and Josephine Miles writes a brilliant love story, the kind that leaves you longing for the romance to develop. As well as the romantic storyline, she tackles the hoarding storyline beautifully. It could have been boring or tedious but it wasn't.

I love the humour in this book. Some of it's very subtle and some of it is cringworthingly (total made up word, but none that exist fit it quite right) out there. The naked parents, I wanted to see more (er, not literally obviously, literally it was all on display they were, after

all, naked) of them. So funny, maybe an angle to consider when the children are old enough to date. But no, the thought of preparing chilli, naked...well yeah. Ouch. I diverse, but these are the thoughts this book had me having. I loved it.

Another new author to add to my got-to-read pile. I'm thinking of avoiding GR for a while, it's seriously bad for my bank account and housework. But then all those books...er Jasper, could I have the phone number for Lewis please?

Want another unicorn's perspective?  Here's Ann's review. 

Review: Crooked Tree Ranch (Montana #1) by R.J. Scott

On the spur of the moment with his life collapsing around him Jayden Sullivan answers an ad for a marketing expert on a dude ranch in Montana. With his small family he moves lock stock and barrel from New York to Montana to start a new life.

Foreman and owner of a third of the ranch, ex rodeo star Nathaniel 'Nate' Todd has been running Crooked Tree Ranch. His partners in the business convince him that he needs to get an expert in to help the ranch survive. He knows things have to change and but when the new guy turns up, with a troubled family in tow - he just isn't prepared for how much.

Jay - city boy extraordinaire

Jay was recently laid off from his marketing job in New York.  He’s desperate to find work so he can support his small family.  He’s taken on the role of provider for his sister and her two kids.  After many unsuccessful attempts at landing a new job in the city he answers an ad for a business manager and marketing director at a dude ranch in Montana…

Nate -  gruff cowboy alpha male

Nate is co-owner of Crooked Tree Ranch, a dude ranch that has been in his family for generations.  After a meeting with one of his partners in which he’s informed they are on the down slope to going under he agrees to hire someone to come in and revamp the ranch and hopefully garner more business.  He never expected someone like Jay to answer their ad.

Jay and Nate were simply adorable together.  After a few false starts they eventually agree to become “friends with benefits” in order to avoid any feelings developing.  Yeah right.  Like that ever works out.  Both want more but is afraid to voice it.  Finally, they decide to cut all the bullshit and just tell each other how they feel.  I love it when honesty prevails and we don’t have to trudge through all the angst to get to the HEA.

There are two things RJ Scott really excels at.  The first is the slow burn.  I’m not normally fond of the slow burn.  I’m more of an insta-love fan.  I have the patience of a four year old who was just told they were going to visit Disney World soon.  When I come across a slow burn, while reading I usually end up saying something like “When are they going to get together?” or “Just hurry up and fuck already!”.  But with Ms. Scott’s books I get drawn in and find myself more invested in the story than the sexy times.  Don’t get me wrong.  I’m all for the sex but I like everything else that goes into one of her books just as much.  The way it is drawn out is not angst ridden.  It is more of a natural progression; something you would see or experience yourself in real life.  Funny thing is, this is the fastest I have ever read of her MC’s getting together.  Usually it takes months or even years with her characters.  This time it only took three weeks.  But it felt like a lot more time was spent with them getting to know each other.  It felt realistic and natural.

The second thing that RJ Scott is aces with is the portrayal of children and family.  In this book in particular, Josh, who is six acts just like a six year old would.  He’s excitable and exuberant and so completely normal and just an all around joy to read about.  Kirsten is a sullen 15 year old who is hiding behind her goth persona and bad attitude until she figures out who she is.  I can relate to every bit of it.  It just makes the book all the more believable.

I was thrilled at how the secondary story lines played out.  The portrayal of the secondary characters was thorough and fully fleshed out.  The time was taken to explain why some characters acted the way they did.  Take Henry for example.  When you first meet him you get the idea that he is just an intolerant, hate filled bastard.  As you get to know him you see there is way more to his story than simple hate.  There are reasons why he is the way he is.  That doesn’t excuse his behavior but at least you have some understanding as to why he acts as he does.

While the story does have a satisfying HEA, there are a few plot lines that are left open ended.  This excites me because it means there are more books to come.  I can’t wait!  I’m eager to read more about these families and how their lives mesh together.

ARC provided by the author in exchange for an honest review.

 

Review: I Don't: A Christmas Wish by Kari Gregg

At least he isn’t pregnant.

Seth Murphy campaigned for Maryland’s Question Six, wildly celebrating the Election Day victory for marriage equality. Divorce attorney and live-in boyfriend Owen, however, believes just as passionately that the gay community should focus on a plurality of equal rights protections instead of allocating so many resources and man-hours to one hot button issue.

Owen won’t marry Seth.

Relationship deteriorating, the couple visits the Murphy farm outside Brunswick for Christmas. Seth’s family never considered that Seth and Owen wouldn’t be first in line for a marriage license as soon as same-sex marriage passed. When they find out there won’t be a wedding, their season of miracles is invaded by pornographic gingerbread cookies, frowning church ladies, and a determined father with a tactical assault shotgun.

Neither Seth, Owen, nor their love may survive the family holiday circus to say, “I don’t.”

If you want a lovely, romantic Christmas story then this is a great one to choose.Seth and Owen are in love. They are in luuuurrrve - so why won't Owen marry Seth now it's legal? He has his reasons, he's very honest about them with Seth but he hasn't quite taken into account Seth's family.

I loved Seth from the start, his feelings for Owen were so apparent and he knew Owen felt the same way, but there is an underlying doubt now. It is often the 'getting together' stories that are the ones that set my heart racing, the will they/won't they of the romantic chase, Seth and Owen are an established couple, yet this book still retains that feeling of anticipation. There relationship was great and even though Seth is upset about Owen's refusal to marry him he sticks up for him with the family.

Owen - well you think you'd want to hate him right? He's breaking poor Seth's heart...but you don't. He's lovely and his feelings for Seth are so apparent, he shows him he loves him all the time - it's just he is a man of principles. BUT, and this is important, he's also not afraid to learn and change.

The family - well there's a comedy that was just itching to be written. Seth's family, the matriarch - refusing to let any kind of shenanigans go on under her roof before a marriage has taken place (despite the fact that when the maths is done there isn't 9 months between her wedding and birth of the first born). The Patriarch with his shotgun who really only carries out the mum's orders. The homophobic younger sister who thinks her life is so perfect with her upcoming nuptials. The cousin who decorates the gingerbread people with all their bits and bobs on display. The grandmother, who liked to be extreme and shock her daughter.I loved this family, it was vaguely reminiscent of the family in the sitcom Bread, though of course only those of you old enough and British enough will be likely to remember that show. Nothing says Christmas cheer to me like an eccentric family.

There really isn't much that I didn't like about this book - in fact the only thing for me was the shot gun scene at the end. I felt uneasy with a gun being waved around in a house full of people, especially children. (That's not to say I didn't like the shotgun jokes running through it). It's a small niggle, after all they are fictional people, ti just made me uneasy. This book is definitely getting a re-read each Christmas, there's nothing like some snowy, Christmassy love to get you feeling seasonal.

Review: Bound to Break (Men of Honor, Book #6) by SE Jakes

Four men fighting against their pasts…and for each other.

Several years after washing up on a beach in South Africa with absolutely no memory—not even his name—Lucky would rather not remember his past. Based on the number of scars on his body, it couldn't have been anything good.

Then a man claiming to be his former Navy SEAL teammate walks into the bar and insists that Lucky’s real name is Josiah Joshua Kent. Turns out he’s been listed as KIA, and since he’s not dead, he’s now AWOL—and under suspicion.

Discovering Josh is alive throws Rex, and his relationship with Sawyer, into a tailspin. Rex can finally lay to rest the nightmares of the night he couldn't save his teammate. And Sawyer is faced with his worst nightmare—a relationship threatened by a very real ghost from the past.

As Josh begins to piece his memories back together, another man with a shadowy connection to his past—and maybe his heart—holds the key that could free him. Or send him to a traitor’s fate.

"Bound to Break" is book #6 from S.E. Jakes military MM series, Men of Honor. You'd think that by book #6, there is not much story to tell, right? Definitely not!

"Bound to Break" comes back in full force with four main characters (this is not menage-though a daisy chain would have not have been frowned upon from this quarter but I digress). We have two couples (Sawyer and Rex, Dash and Luck/Josh) who stories run parallel to the mystery of Lucky. He was presumed dead by his team in the Navy SEALS including his former lover Rex. Four years later he is found alive, scarred & damaged from terrorists and has amnesia. He can't remember anything before the four years he has been declared Killed In Action.

Lucky has been working for Dash's family's bar as a bartender and civilian, not knowing the world he left behind or even his own name. The mysterious Dash has been away for six years for reasons he did not choose to share. A freak encounter changes not only Lucky's life or Dash's life but Lucky's former teammates' lives as well including Rex.

The plot lines were not hard to follow. Should you read all of the books prior? Yes, I think so. Rex and Sawyer were mentioned in previous books so I think the added back story will help with the experience of both characters. Josh/Lucky was mentioned in passing. Dash (the South African-American blonde bowl of yum) is totally new. (Can I say South African accents are in my top faves? Just saying.)

We get brief mentions of Rex and Sawyer's past. They are the established couple of the bunch so there was not much angst or unnecessary drama thrown in to spice it up because those two are hot enough to carry it off. There is a brief trip to D/s world but it was pretty light but very hot. The main issue was Lucky aka Josh. Rex struggles with accepting Josh is alive...and when they last saw each other they were lovers very much in love. Lucky struggles with learning about his past, he can't remember anything, is not sure who to trust (might I add Dash's first move does not add to the situation but I was not mad at him as the story progressed) and falling for the untrustworthy Dash.

We get visits of Clint and Jace (Sawyer's best friend and teammate), lots of doses of snark, great secondary characters and hot sex. The sex...two thumbs up! Add in the suspense and these four men's struggles, it equaled one enticing read. There's action, in and outside the bedroom. And a couple of twists and turns. The story is fast paced, everything is not what they seem and somehow, love is found.

Around 80%, these thoughts were running through my mind: the suspense of who the hell is who, who should be trusted, what the hell is going on, I don't think a HEA can be possible...I was anxious/nervous and would have been fine with a HFN. But we get a HEA, of course! This is S.E. Jakes and she definitely does deliver the hotness.

There's just something about picturing muscle bound hunks of military real life heroes loving one another that melts my butter. They can kick ass like no other and then having them get their man...it's great!

Sounds like I lurved this book and wanted to get to know it better, so why 4.5 stars? There was the insta-love of Dash and Lucky. I wouldn't have minded more buildup between the two but for what was given it was pretty good. Also we jump right into sex in the first 10%, luckily there is story to go with it, removing it from being called PWP.  There most definitely is a plot, I felt like I was reading a MM version of the Scandal television show or something to that effect. SE Jakes has stepped up the game with intrigue and suspense. And thankfully, the HEA is more realistic with not everything being solved and tied up in a neat bow.

If there are any more planned books for this series *coughs*hope so*coughs*Uncle please*coughs*, I am so there!

P.S. When the couples join forces together, I swear the only song playing in my head was AC/DC's "Back in Black" so if I chose a theme song, that would be it. ;D


A copy provided by the author for an honest review.

Guest Review: You Are Here by Chris Delyani (A review by Jenn!)

Happy December! Today on the blog we have a guest reviewer, Jenn, to tell us a little bit about an under the radar m/m romance read. Please give her a giant unipornian welcome! *chorus of clinking unicorn horns*

***

All Peter Bankston ever wanted to do was paint. 

An aspiring painter, Peter scratches out a pauper's living in San Francisco, wanting nothing more than to be left alone. Instead, he finds himself getting involved with not one but two very different men. 

Like Peter, getting involved with another man is the last thing on Nick Katsaris's mind. Smart, handsome, and good-humored, Nick's done more than just survive -- he's positively thriving in San Francisco. But when he meets Peter, what begins as fun and games quickly turns into a game he can't control. 

Miles Bettencourt's days are filled with longing. For him, San Francisco is haunted by Stuart, his missing ex-lover. Desperate to win him back, Miles wanders the streets in the hope of running into Stuart again. Instead, he runs into Peter -- the one man who might hold the key to what Miles is looking for.

These three gay men soon form one very unlikely love triangle. Sometimes, when people break apart and then come together, they learn that discovering that where you are is the key to knowing who you are.

I have mixed feelings about this book, mostly because of expectations.  For some reason, I had the impression You Are Here was a light, funny contemporary romance.  I have no idea why I thought that, but I kept the idea in my head I had read that somewhere.  Then as I started reading it, I kept thinking was this going to be a ménage?  Read some reviews and absolutely not.  OK, so it’s not a ménage, its' got some angst, but it is contemporary.  However, this isn’t something I could see ever, ever rereading because I found the situations so sad, ugly and depressing; even if it did depict everyday truths and life lessons in an extreme way.

I guess if I had to compare it to anything, I’d say it reminded me often of another San Francisco based book/series: Armistead Maupin’s Tales of the City. I’ve read that entire series and actually loved it and I kept wondering what it was about You Are Here that I wasn’t enjoying it, and like I said; I guess it boils down to me reading something about broken relationships, near rape, crazed-stalkers that try to kill you, blackmail, family issues, and a man you keep hoping will learn and who doesn’t when I had been looking forward to an entirely different type of book.  I realize this is MY issue, not the book’s. 

The characterizations, however, are great because it’s a lot of characters with three central point of views and initially I wasn’t drawn to any of them, but over the course of the book; I grew to care for a couple of them.  Peter is a shy and quiet 25 year-old budding artist, so nondescript that even the reader fails to notice him, let alone the other characters.  Over the course of the book, though, Peter becomes an adult, for lack of a better term.  His growth is so gradual, so realistic that I didn’t even notice the change until it struck me and I found myself proud of him.  Proud that he didn’t settle, that he spoke up, that he wanted better for himself and was willing to lose everything for that.  Miles, at the beginning, is a wandering, broken man suffering from the end of his engagement.  Looking and feeling angry, he keeps everyone away.  He holds onto perceived wrongs.  His journey wasn’t as enjoyable to me; though, I still felt a tug of happiness at the end.  Nick was my favorite character and the one that shattered my heart.  I can’t talk about his journey without major spoilers, but he was frustrating to me on so many damn levels.  He’s the charmer, the lonely person that hides behind a long list of acquaintances, the scared person, the bored and agitated person itching to get out of his skin…he’s more than what you read or would see on the surface.

So in saying all of that, it doesn’t sound like a bad book, and it isn’t.  I still found just situation after situation I didn’t enjoy.  I’m glad there wasn’t any explicit sex, and it was nice reading a story with less than physically perfect MC’s, but there was more than enough ugliness within the story to take that place.  Just nasty, spiteful behavior.  Often times the actions of the characters were so manic I felt actually disturbed.  Like I said earlier in my review, the book puts everyday mundane situations but twists them in larger than life way.  It depressed me.  I wanted some happiness, and I was hard-pressed to find any.  Also that ending…I guess it worked out the way it needed to, the way it would realistically have worked out, but it wasn’t the one I was hoping for, so it kind of broke my heart.  You Are Here is a good book, though.  I just would classify more as fiction and a character study than an actual romance.

~ A Guest Review by Jenn ~

Sunday Funday!!! Cooking with a Special Ingredient?!!

Thanksgiving has just passed for us over here in the States, so looking for new recipes might not be on the forefront of the mind. But here at the UM headquarters, we are always looking for the latest trends, newest recipes...*UM chants* recipe reading FTW! (Inside joke...ha, she said inside.)

*snickers* So imagine my surprise when a fellow unicorn brought this recipe book to my attention, "Natural Harvest: A collection of semen-based recipes" by Paul 'Fotie' Photenhauer some days ago. This is serious, boys and girls. Not a gag gift (ha!) but honest to goodness food recipes with an added protein ingredient...semen!

So you know I had to go investigate this recipe tome with my serious detecting magnifying glass, kick ass rain boots (because from the sound of the book someone was going to get sticky and messy) and trusty search engine. And within seconds...mind blown.

There's a website: http://cookingwithcum.com, how to videos, customer attestations and ANOTHER FRIGGING BOOK! Hold onto your seats...I'll get to that after I share my findings of the food book.

And it is all safe for work. Surprised, smutsters? I know.

Fellow coffee lovers...there is something for you. I'm more a half & half girl myself but who can turn down extra cream:

Health nuts (LOL) needing that extra boost? Add a little protein shake to your smoothie!

Tired of the same ol' BBQ sauce, wanting a special kick? Why not add some splooge?!

Oysters are already an aphrodisiac (allegedly) if you're cooking with "Natural Harvest", baby, you're adding man chowder to add that extra essence.

Now before you go run off to add two ball throat cream to all your fave recipes, you're probably going to be a bit thirsty from all of that food. Apparently, the penis genie has answered your devious request (don't worry I'll keep it between you and I, promise) and created a mixed drink book full of sperm, nut butter, mmm...cum! "Semenology: The Semen Bartender's Handbook"

For those looking to coat their...*coughs*throat*coughs*

Here's two recipes from the handbook (get it handbook...because you're going to need a hand or more to get that prostate milk...subtle *wink*)

Here's the Galliano Cum Shot!

And the ever popular Macho Mojito!

There's even a how-to video on the website to make a Macho Mojito...

Maybe there are holidays, special occasions probably cumming up in your neck of the woods... Why not give that special someone a gift that keeps on giving? Say it with care and trouser gravy to that special someone.

Or maybe...just maybe you might want to test it out...no judging here, folks. Just put that special baby-making music a la slow jams, dim the lights and the ingredients...flow.

Enjoy!